Clinging to the past


28 years ago “Fresh Prince of Bel Air” premiered on NBC. Starring, a 21 year old Willard Carroll Smith Jr (as Will)

Last week, I came across a video of Janet Hubert on Facebook. While most people know Will Smith, few people know Ms Hubert by her given name. However, she is known the world over as the original Aun’t Viv, she was 34 years old, when the show premiered.

M’s Hubert, was replaced by Daphne Maxwell Reid at the beginning of the fourth season.  Rumors suggested  Ms Hubert was difficult on the set of the sitcom, bumping heads with cast members and it’s star.

For the last 25 years years, Mr Hubert has been in a one person feud with Will Smith. She has blamed him for her inability to get work, her financial situation and  her son’s attempted suicide.

In her July 16th (2018) you tube post, she directs the video directly at Mr Smith. In addition to Smith, she attacked Perez Hilton, the black community and called Bet and Vibe the nigger networks.

It’s clear she has been trolling the Smith family, wife Jada and their children. She wants a face to face meeting with Smith .While she does acknowledge, Mr Smith’s kind words about her, she want’s to talk to him about events that took place more than 25 years ago.

When I look at her other you tube posts, she quickly lashes out at anyone who questions her or disagrees with her.  It appears she is angry with former cast mates reserving  most of her ire at Will Smith and Alfonso Ribeiro who has been critical of her. From what I’ve seen, when ever she is on TV, Will Smith is front and center.  She insists the cast members dislike each other.  However, the cast seem to be in contact with each other and speak well of other cast mates. With one exception in 1993, where he told a Atlanta radio station she was fired, he has had nothing but positive words about his experience with Ms Hubert.

While Smith and family have gone on to live their lives, its seems Ms Hubert life is stalled in the past and its very clear that she is comfortable looking rearward. Every now and them the Smith’s are asked to respond to something Ms Hubert has said to the press and from what I can see both Jada and Will are gracious.

There are many Ms Hubert’s who despite their words find comfort in the past. Blaming an event, an individual or individuals, a parent or someone or something  that prevents them from moving forward. With a well rehearsed story, so fresh it seemed it happened yesterday.

Many of these people need this narrative that was so damaging that they are unable to move forward.

For many of us, it is an excuse. Everyday people with challenging lives are fired, everyday someones heart is broken, we lose someone, and we are disappointed.

Hearts take time and isn’t a preset healing time. While some heart’s heal sooner that others, there are a few people who are so broken, they reject the healing process, they pick and reopen the wound to perhaps, keep the story fresh.

For some, the benefit of reliving the event is the sympathy it generates. Rarely does the narrator include a timestamp, when the event took place. In doing so, it reduces the impact of the story.

One wonders if these people are able to move on. Janet Hubert has spent 28 years angry. A lifetime.

CityFella

Rent Control Sacramento: The City offers a Bandaid to slow the bleeding


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Sacramento is the fastest growing big city in the State of California.  The capital city has seen a 9.4 increase in rent, three times higher than the national average and double the states average.

With rents averaging $1700, the Capital city has become an attractive and lower cost alternative to renters in the San Francisco Bay Area and Los Angeles County.  The city has become popular with Millennials.  Sacramento, is the third most popular destination after Seattle and Nashville.

The new arrivals aren’t challenged by the rent prices

In Sacramento, fewer landlord are offering yearly leases ,opting for month to month agreements where they can increase rents with a 30 notice.     Many long term renters have experienced several rent increases this year.    After 16 years in a South Land Park Apartment, one tenant received 3 rent increases in less then seven months. Her dishwasher and disposal hasn’t worked in more than two year.  Today her rent is 62% of her income and she is not alone.    Sacramento’s eviction rate is more than twice the state average.

Fast Facts 

Don’t believe the Hype, not everyone is leaving California for Texas, Nevada, Oregon and Arizona, the state’s population continues to grow.  Nearly 40 million people call the Golden State Home.    There is a housing shortage in most population centers in state with Sacramento being one of the worst in the nation. According to Yardi matrix , Sacramento ranked 90 of the 96 markets. While Sacramento needs 2700 units annually to meet demand, only 593 apartments were completed in 2017.

While there has always been a need for affordable housing, the city eased requirements shortly after the Real Estate bubble burst and reduced funding for the program.

The Basic Myth 

Rent control will stop construction on new housing units……..

In most cities in California, (including Sacramento) apartment construction are at record levels.   Even in cities with existing rent control laws.  Developers set the rent on new developments,  once occupied, the cities rent controls would apply.   

Passage of Proposition 10 in November would allow California cities to place rent controls on new development. 

 (If the developer cant make a viable profit they may choose not to build.)

Tenants will not leave their rent control apartments, resulting in an shortages.  

The objective data, doesn’t support this.

 

Sacramento’s 

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It very clear, Sacramento’s Mayor Darrell Steinberg’s and some members of the city council do not support any form of rent control.   His support of temporary measures disappointed many attending the rent control workshop last night.

Steinberg: “I do not favor permanent rent control in our city,” “I believe building more affordable housing is the best way to stabilize rents. 

  Funding for affordable housing may take 7 to 10 years. The reality for his constituents is they needed rent relief yesterday. They needed relief the first hour he took office.

(Government:   I want you to know we understand what your going through, needing shelter from the rain.  Currently there isn’t funding for umbrellas.   I have instructed my  has been instructed to locate funding.   Finding a source may take some time, but I assure you we will make this a top Priority. After a few necessary meetings with governmental agencies,  we should get funding for that umbrella you clearly need in two years, nine years tops! )  

Mayor Steinberg, supports a cap of 5% on annual rent increases that would expire after three years. The cap, would apply to apartments older than 20 years.

This is a slap in the face for renters in the city.  He has excluding more than a few thousand apartments units, built during Sacramento’s last building boom between the late nineties to 2007. What happens to rents after the cap expires? 

Council members Steve Hansen, Eric Guerra and Rick Jennings suggested mediation be available to tenants if a landlord attempted to raise the rent by more than 6 percent.  Their plan would also make it mandatory for landlords with more than five units to offer 18-month leases, which Jennings said isn’t as extreme as rent control and would help stabilize rental rates.“  According to their proposal, if a tenant who receives a rent increase of more than 6 percent within a 12-month period requests mediation, they must still pay rent, plus the 6 percent increase, until the dispute is resolved.

Mediation?  Rent control let talk about it?  This proposal is completely absurd! 

This was clearly written by individuals who a have close ties with developers or own property in the city.  Rent control isn’t a new language, there isn’t a code to crack.  Not only is there several resources available members of their staff could make calls to cities along I-80 as  Richmond, Berkeley and San Francisco have rent control legislation in place. There is nothing ambiguous in those cities agreements.  In San Francisco, rent increases are limited to 6% a year*  no meetings, the landowner would need to get permission from the city to increase rents beyond the cap.   (* The landlord can exceed the cap if capital improvements are required) 

 

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Sacramento currently needs 2700 units of new housing annually.  In time, the demand  will only increase.  The city’s homeless population is growing by the hour. Sacramento has joined, San Jose, San Francisco and many other cities with employed individuals living in their cars, camping in our parks, because they cant afford housing.   According to the Sacramento County Coroner’s office, in 2016, 78 homeless people died within the county. But in 2017, 124 people died: an increase of more than 150%. One homeless person dies every three days.

This issue of housing and homelessness isn’t just a Sacramento problem its a national problem.  Its a national disgrace.  Ignored until it overwhelms.

The primary issue isn’t rent in the the new developments in Sacramento.  It is the exorbitant rent increases renters are experiencing all over the city.    Long term tenants are facing rent increases because the landlord can.   Resulting in fear, insecurity, and helplessness.

Proposition 10, may not be the answer to the state’s housing shortage. It is an reaction, to the inaction of local government .  The noise generated by the  renters of Sacramento have forced Mayor Steinberg and company to look at rent control.  Their proposed fixes won’t slow the bleeding Sacramento.

A genuine approach would be an ordinance that would immediately cap all rent increases to 6% city wide.   An ordinance that would prevent evictions without cause. (which would prevent landowner from evicting tenants to circumventing the law)

Tax incentives to those developers that include market rate housing in their projects.  Incentives to developers who add housing to their projects throughout these adding additional intensives for developer to build near light rail stations.  These projects could be managed thorough  Sacramento’s Housing Authority.   Returning to reality, none of these are likely to happen.

Renters of Sacramento,will have to make rent control a part of law.   There is no need to   have to re-invent the wheel as several templates   There are rent control advocates in the State that will participate in penning the law.

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CityFella

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Real Housewives of Atlanta S10 Reunion Pt 2 A-G-O-N-Y! Waiting for Kim


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Lawd have mercy, Lawd have mercy, LAWD HAVE MUR-CEE!!   This effing rapegate may FINALLY BE OVAH!  Between Kandi and Porsha.  I think after one apologies this one my have stuck.

Speaking of stuck, Bravo has stuck us with this lame reunion.  They are holding some of us captive, until next week when we finally see Nene and Wig go at it…  And fuck! (yeah I said it) it better be Epic!

This reunion much like this season has been much to do about Nothing.  Speaking of nothing why is Marlo still here?   Marlo doesn’t appreciate, Kenya calling her a HO. (not a garden tool)   When Andy, (who I might add is keeping this reunion afloat with his own shade) ask Marlo how does she make her money?   She tells Andy, she dated a billionaire. Who is not Ted Turner.   The billionaire, bought her home and her mothers home and her Aston Martin.     And she has a LLC ” Simply Marlo”.    Kenya!  “We see each other”

 

Andy asked Nene about her epic breakdown in Oakland. (Telling a heckler-she hoped she would get raped by a  Uber driver)   Nene seemed sincerely sorry.  Sheree was offended. Next.

Eva, came out  having contractions. (Dr Jackie is on call)  She and Cynthia had a few moments regarding Will.  Was he seeing someone the same time as he was seeing Cynthia?  Of course this is one more example of this stupid season.  Cynthia and Will weren’t anything to each other, so WHO CARES IF HE WAS DATING ANOTHER WOMEN!!!!!

Cynthia has moved on and is seeing someone else. Shady Andy suggested that Cynthia explore her clear attraction to women.

7 Minutes

Bravo played us!

It was all a tease. The sit down with Wig (Kim to her friends) was saved for the last few minutes of last night’s episode.

Nene’s back was erect. She came out looking good in a red dress and her red solo cup (Houston is there a problem?)

Andy, an equal opportunity shade master asked her “What the end game on the lip”  (This destroyed twitter)

They began with the Elephant Room . Where Kim told Cynthia to be quiet and look pretty.  Kim says she never suggested that Cynthia is lucky she’s beautiful because she’s not capable of much else.   The Receipts says your a lier.  The footage shows  Kim saying that Cynthia is lucky she’s beautiful because she’s not capable of much else.

Another dig from Andy:  He  compares Kim’s pivoting tendencies to Sarah Huckabee Sanders. Then Kim asks, “Who the hell is that?”

A moment with Dr CityFella:  I’ve always suspected Nene rage towards Kim is love. Outside of Sheree, Nene has known Kim more than 10 years.   It was Nene who suggested  Kim come on to the show. and Unlike Sheree, these two had a genuine friendship.  Nene said, she saw Kim at the mall and she believes Kim saw her and didn’t acknowledge her.  The Elephant room was another attempt to patch the hole in there friendship. 

Kim, insist she never say Nene at the mall. or took a photo of her car in the handicapped  Then we see the footage of her doing what she said she didn’t do.   Bleep, Bleep, Bleep,

Meanwhile

Southern Charm “New Orleans” Premiered after the Housewives has promise.   The Real Housewives of the Potomac, looks good this season.   Beverly Hills has one more episode before the Reunion and its about to go down at the Hampton’s in New York (read my review)   Bravo is going to have overhaul Atlanta, we deserve better.!

CityFella

 

Hotel Confidential: Fake, Fake, Fake, News!


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Civility is getting difficult to find in these Trump times.

 For some, Fox News is the only place where one can find the truth, and for them ANY OTHER  news channels is NOT acceptable.   Arguments and sometime fights are taking place in hospitals lounges, restaurants and hotels over the news channel.

The disagreements aren’t not between, teenagers, Gen Y or even those carefree Millennials.  They are between those snow capped Baby Boomers, who fight over remotes, push plates on the floor, and at times complain because they are forced to watch subversive television or hateful television.

Last week, a woman having early morning breakfast with her four friends between 70-87 (it was her birthday)  complained about CNN being on.  “Its not real news”  she said and wanted the channel changed to Fox News.

The breakfast person refused, as there were others watching the newscast.  The women angrily returned to the table with her friends.   Suddenly, the women and her friends began chanting “Fake News, Fake News, Fake News , this went on for a couple of minutes.

On the television screen was the Thousand Oaks, shooting.

“Fake News 2018”

 

 

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Taste This………


 

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Ewwwww, this taste rancid!  Oh my Gawd, I think I’m gonna be sick, taste it!

 

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must I try something that makes you sick.?  Not only do I trust your judgement, I trust your taste buds.

 

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do you insist that I get sick too.   Is it some twisted initiation to some club were we vomit as a group?

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So If you come at me with a fork or spoon.  Insisting that I join you in your taste horror, I will not be responsible for what happens next !

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CityFella

 

Kracking Up


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Reality is slowly sinking into Prezy Poo.  He never really had a grasp on how government worked. 

Despite his best efforts he BLEW it.  He didn’t listen to those seasoned members of the GOP who advised him to talk about the economy, record unemployment. He instead went for FEAR, TERROR and MAYHEM.  As a result, many of his supporters bailed on him and went blue.

If he wants money for a Parade?  he may need approval from some of those low I Q members of Congress.

Money for a wall, that Mexico will eventually pay for? He may need approval from a one or two Mexicans.

What did you say about banning Muslims?  Again perhaps you should talk to the two Muslim members just elected to Congress?

 More than 100  women were elected in Congress last week.  Women were elected into the Senate, for the first time nearly 25% of the Senate is female.  More ladies will be heading States.  At one point in your administration you will need a WOMAN’s approval.  I’m sure you NEVER dreamed you would need permission from a woman.  Welcome to 2019 and beyond and remember, these women will outlive the men in your administration! 

Mr President, You have spent the last few years avoiding Americans. Your administration is filled with people who look like you.  Last last week America came to you. 

Congress writes the checks so , If you need any money, you will need approval from Gay’s, Native Americans, Muslims, Blacks, Asians and Mexicans, all Americans.

CityFella

 

 

The Author of Boy Erased Hopes His Experience in Conversion Therapy Makes People Angry


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Focus Features

“I’m aiming an arrow directly into the heart of America.” That was Joel Edgerton’s promise to Boy Erased author Garrard Conley from the very beginning when Edgerton began writing and directing the film adaptation of Conley’s vulnerable memoir about his experience with “conversion therapy.”

By: Elena Hilton\Esquire.com

It was a risk for Conley to share his story in the first place, let alone allow other artists to interpret his life in the form of an Oscar-hopeful movie. But thankfully he took the leap, because the trauma he endured at Love in Action, an “ex-gay” Christian ministry that attempted to change people’s sexual orientation, is something that America desperately needs to recognize.

 

Currently, 15 states and Washington, D.C. have laws to protect minors from “conversion therapy” practices, and the Trump-Pence administration’s bigotry-laden rhetoric and policies are a stark reminder that the fight isn’t over. “We’re getting so close to the finish line that I’m becoming more radical and more of an activist each day,” Conley says.

Conley’s Southern, ultra-Christian upbringing—his father became a Baptist preacher in their small Arkansas town when Conley was a teenager—is similar to so many other LGBTQ adolescents who are still being told they’re wrong for who they are. The hope is that this film, along with Conley’s 2016 book, will open people’s eyes to the real effects that bigotry has on lives.

Prior to Boy Erased’s limited theatrical release (it opens in theaters this weekend), I sat down with Conley to talk about what it was like seeing his memoir translated into a Hollywood film and how he’s used his experiences to become an activist for the LGBTQ community.

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Joel Edgerton directs a scene in Boy Erased Focus Features

Joel Edgerton proved right away why he was the best person to adapt Boy Erased.

At first I was very nervous about the whole thing, partly because I hadn’t met a lot of movie stars—I’m just not in that world, I’m a writer. Just going into the meeting with Joel was stressful, but then I was like, “He’s a straight guy, what’s he going to do the story? We’ve been burned before.” But at our first meeting he asked to meet with other conversion therapy survivors in addition to me, and I loved the fact that he wanted to hear all of our stories.

Plus, I had just watched Loving, which he was in. It was a movie about the first interracial marriage and all the legal battles that went along with that, and he was using that publicity tour to talk about marriage equality now, much to the detriment to some of the family that was involved with the making of that film because they didn’t actually want that. [Edgerton] was like “I don’t care, I’m not going to work with a film that doesn’t recognize bigotry across the board.” So I already knew that he was a good ally, but he also asked if I wanted to write the script. I said I couldn’t write it again for a different audience and I don’t know how to “Hollywood-up” a story. So he wrote a script really rapidly, and throughout the process he made me feel better by always sending me the drafts of the script and asking if there was anything problematic or anything that didn’t feel right, and he would change it anytime I said there was an issue.

Conley fought to keep the ending of the movie similar to his real-life experience.

I think there’s a natural desire to have Russell Crowe’s character [Crowe plays Conley’s father] to come around and show what that kind of acceptance would look like. And I can see why that kind of editorial vision would exist, because it gives parents a path for rehabilitation. But I strongly argued for a closer truth, which is that it’s still complicated, and my dad’s not completely there yet. The film might lose a bit of money because it doesn’t have the redemptive arc for the parents that the studio originally wanted, but I pushed pretty hard on making it complicated at the end because I knew other survivors hadn’t had happy stories with their parents. So [Edgerton] changed that, and one of the producers was like, “Well, we might have just lost millions of dollars, but good job with your principles.”

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                  Author Garrard Conley on the set of Boy Erased with Lucas Hedges

Kyle Kaplan/Focus Features

He was blown away by Lucas Hedges, who plays him in the movie.

Lucas is a dream. The first time we met, we were walking around DUMBO, and he said, “You know, I wasn’t going to do this, but do you want to come back to my apartment and talk?” He still has a room in his father’s [director Peter Hedges] house. So we went over there and he invited me into his childhood bedroom and said, “If you’re going to show me everything, then I need to show you everything.” And then he showed me his copy of my book, which was marked up on every page. I felt it was the greatest tribute someone who was going to play me could do. I was already pretty convinced, and then when Lucas started to share his identity on the spectrum with me—he wasn’t quite aware of where he was, but he knew that he wasn’t entirely straight—that was the last hurdle where I thought, “Okay, this guy can play it.

He’d explained to me a sense of shame that he’d felt, and he later talked about it in the New York magazine piece, and he wasn’t really specific about it, but he did tell me he that he thought he was fluid in some way. So he had the shame aspect, and the actual identity, so that was going to play well on the screen. And he’s phenomenal in it. [His performance] is understated in many ways, but it’s very accurate. The way he’s able to depict fear and shame on his face is actually really terrifying. He’s my favorite thing in the movie. Just watching him is mesmerizing.

Writing the memoir was an emotionally draining, but necessary, experience.

Boy Erased: A Memoir of Identity, Faith, and Family
RIVERHEAD amazon.com$10.87

I had to really look at it like a story, which is hard to do, because you have to cut through all the trauma and, in many ways, the false memories you’ve created to get over stuff and to go back to those places mentally which is incredibly difficult. And it’s harmful for the people around you—my boyfriend at the time suffered through a lot of episodes where I was not okay. He was always like, “Why are you doing this to yourself, why are you writing this?” And I didn’t always have a clear answer to that, it was just that I had to.

Any time you turn anything into a story, you lose the “life-iness” of it, because you’ve got to shape it into art, and that feels uncomfortable because it’s all true, all these things happened, but you’re shaping it for an audience. It feels like a bit of a sacrifice because I’m very precious with my memories and my internal account of things. And whenever you’re told that you’re crazy or corrupt in some way, you’re a little suspicious about putting it out there into the world again. But I did it because, from the very beginning, with the book and this film, the project has been to make something compelling enough to drive the conversation forward. I’d seen the same old arguments and the same old depictions of conversion therapy over and over again, which is it’s a joke, it’s a farce, and it’s not true. It’s soul murder, and I wanted that story to be told.

The memoir was released before Trump’s election, and Conley probably wouldn’t have written the same version now.

It’s a very anti-LGBT administration. It was so different, rhetorically, to humanize people like my parents or even the [conversion therapy] counselors when Obama was president than it is right now to humanize them, because it’s almost asking too much empathy from people who feel like their lives are on the line. I don’t know if I would have written the same book right now. I think I would have been angrier and I might not have been so forgiving, so it might actually not have worked as well to write it now.

There is kind of a weird irony in the fact that because all the stuff came out about Mike Pence supporting conversion therapy, it’s actually made conversion therapy a headline and now it’s easier to get people’s attention. I wouldn’t say I’m grateful for it, but it’s an opportunity. It’s unfortunate, but this is something the right has been invested in for a very long time. They’ll throw [the LGBTQ community] under a bus at any moment just to score political points.

We’re definitely at a turning point. It’s either going to go, hopefully, in the way of, “Let’s stop pretending respectability politics exist and let’s be as radical as we need to be in order to get shit done,” but it could easily go the other way.

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Nicole Kidman and Russell Crowe in Boy Erased Focus Features

He hopes people realize that conversion therapy and toxic masculinity affects everyone.

One of things I always say is conversion therapy doesn’t have to be done in a facility. If you’re taught to be a “certain type of man”, to act a certain way, and you’re taught by authority figures that being gay is evil, then that’s conversion therapy too. Conversion therapy can function as a metaphor for the kinds of brainwashing that we’ve all been given. Once you’re done looking at everyone’s side of the story, you can begin to see a system in place that harms everyone.

I often think about how I feel ashamed to be a man in this culture, and I talked to a trans activist named Thomas Page McBee who wrote Amateur and Man Alive about those feelings, and he was like, “You need to consider the fact that you’re harming yourself whenever you believe that masculinity is one thing and that it’s just the toxic brand.” It was just so eye-opening to hear that from someone like him who’d grown up conditioned to be a woman, then transitioned to a man, and had to deal with all that bullshit. I realized we need to look at the systems in place, and those systems can turn people into monsters.

Activists should recognize that there’s not a one-size-fits-all solution.

Faith is such a strange thing. It can be an incredibly powerful tool to survive something and it can also be something that keeps you locked in a fundamentalist worldview for a very long time. It covers up the moments of doubt. Getting out of that system is incredibly difficult. There are a lot of activists who call for people to move out of their towns and go somewhere else, but they’re often forgetting that people don’t have money, they don’t have the social capabilities to even do that without getting lost in the shuffle.

They also kind of ignore the psychological toil that comes from splitting from everything you’ve ever known. It’s not easy, and I think in larger metropolitan areas there can be a tendency to forget what it’s like to be on the ground in many of these towns across the country, and even if we don’t want to, we have to educate people who have perpetuated this bigotry from the very beginning.

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Garrard Conley and his mother, Martha, on the set of Boy Erased Kyle Kaplan/Focus Features

Conley’s own relationship with the South and Christianity is still evolving.

I try to be a strong voice for the South being a complex place, because I do believe there are pockets of real, amazing, radical work that’s being done in the South. Even in the more fundamentalist communities, there are people within that are fighting the good fight. That being said, I think the South and many churches have not reckoned with their past. There are affirming churches who do not talk about what they did in terms of conversion therapy and the lives that were lost as a result of the choices that they made, and I call bullshit on that.

They need to hold themselves accountable, just like they did in terms of how they treated other races or what they did with slavery in the past. They should continue to talk about that, because unless you do, you’re not going to have any moral standing whatsoever. You’re trying to say “come here, learn how to be a good person,” but how are you going to do that if you don’t address the horrible things that you’ve done to the [LGBTQ] community? And if you just say, “I did it out of love, but it was wrong, and I’m sorry,” then that’s fine, I’m okay with that. But you’ve got to say something.

In terms of my own personal faith, I’ve actually begun praying a lot more lately, which is an unusual and unexpected development. I don’t necessarily believe in fate, but I do feel like I’m in a very intense position with a lot of responsibility in terms of how I represent the survivor groups, how I represent LGBT people through the culture at large, and how I can end conversion therapy, while not sacrificing our community to do so. Because that’s incredibly confusing and scary to me, I’ve just started praying, and I don’t know who I’m praying to, but I try to just ask for guidance in some way.

A slap in the face? Donald Trump Skips Veterans Events


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While France’s President Emmmanuel Maconand  German Chancellor Angela Merkel attened events at the Aisne-Marne American Cemetery and Memorial in Belleau, France on Saturday.     President Trump said the weather made it too risky for him to safely fly there.  The event, marking Armistice Day where Americans who died in both world wars are buried.

Early this morning President Trump Tweeted

This would include ballots from Contractors and  members of the Military stationed overseas.

Today the White House Released

President Trump is spending Monday at the White House and had no plans to visit Arlington National Cemetery in northern Virginia as America observes the Veterans Day holiday.

The Real Housewives of Atlanta S11 ep2 “South Peach”


 

Were into to second episode, and if it continues this way, its gonna be a smooth season.

Were still in Miami waiting for the other ladies to arrive from Atlanta to surprise Nene.

So far this season Porsha, who couldn’t buy a non-scandalous camera time last year is the face of RHOA so far this season.

Were in Miami, where Porsha is with her man Dennis.  Porsha is more than a little upset because Dennis doesn’t want to share his toothbrush.

Vanderpump Rules What GIF by Slice

 Porsha, who is too old told to act this Giddy over her man.  And she’s so pissed, over the tooth brush she picks a silly fight with Dennis  “I use it every day at home!” She doesn’t understand why she can’t use it now! Where was he and who was he with? Some real silly shit that repels a man.

The other ladies arrived and its time for annual the Housewives run for the room.   However, Porsha put kibosh by pre assigning rooms, every body is ok except the bitch without a Peach!  Marlo!

 

In what could have been a major scream fest between Marlo and Porsha worked out.

With Marlo’s clothes all over the Penthouse.  Porsha borrowed Marlo’s Versace and a few items.  The two laughed and after a night of laughter and had bonding.  Porsha said she never really disliked Marlo and Marlo said her bluntness can get her in trouble.

The ladies surprise is just what she needed.   Nene was the MC of the comedy set and Nene’s joke about Kandi licking coohie…it didst go over well.  Kandi smiled, but its too close too soon.

Nene opens a new Miami Swaggalicious boutique in a hotel two blocks away.   Marlo overacted and two blocks was an imposition and didn’t understand the Uber concept.  They made it screaming corns intact.

Meanwhile, Kandi DOES know Porsha’s boo Dennis.  She knows a LOT.  For now its underwraps.  For Now……………….

What do you think about the season so far?

CityFella

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What Waking Up Transgender in America Feels Like


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I’m going to be entirely honest. I’m so damn tired. I have been sitting here, staring at a blank computer screen trying my best to muster up the energy to write. I want so badly to explain to you the anger, sadness, pain, and fear that I feel as a transgender person after the news that the Trump administration will likely release a memo later this year effectively denying the existence of trans people.

I know I need to write. I need to have my voice heard. I need to speak out, to yell, to demand action, to ask for your support. I don’t really have any choice not to. To remain silent on the cusp of my civil rights being taken away feels tantamount to giving up. But honestly, it took me four hours to find the mental wherewithal just to write that paragraph.

Perhaps it’s best for me explain how I got here. Let me give a glimpse of the emotional cycle a transgender person goes through in this country today.

Saturday was perfect. Braving the scorching LA heat, I was privileged to be able to moderate a panel for GLSEN at “Models of Pride,” the world’s largest LGBTQ youth conference. That evening, I got to play the proud girlfriend for my partner, a board member for GLSEN’s LA chapter, at a professional mixer. As our hectic day wound down, we went home, cooked some pizza, changed into pajamas, and turned on the latest season of Daredevil. I fell asleep curled up next to the love of my life, content at all that I had accomplished.

After such a long and exhausting day, preceded by an even longer work week, I was ready to use my Sunday to finally relax. I would spend a couple hours cuddling in bed, catch up on some video games, and watch even more of Vincent D’Onofrio’s amazing performance as the Kingpin.

I didn’t get to have any of that.

Instead, I woke to my girlfriend telling me to look at the news. Popping online, I learned that the Trump administration will soon enact a policy defining away the existence of transgender people. I read that the most powerful man in the world believed that I had been, as The New York Times put it, “wrongfully extend[ed] civil rights protections.” Thus began my Sunday.

At first, I was curious. What would this policy actually entail? When would it be implemented? As someone who is post-gender confirmation surgery and has changed all her gender documentation, would this affect me? What does this mean for intersex people? What would the ramifications for my daily life be?  Which of my rights would be affected? As my brain swirled with questions, my girlfriend and I sat on opposite sides of the bed, lost in our own worlds of worry.

Then, I was angry. How can Trump’s administration say I don’t exist!? I’m right here! I just want to live my life in peace! They can’t take away my rights, my gender identity, everything that I have spent so hard fighting for these past few years! I spent my morning shower and breakfast in a sea of red.

Then, I was vocal. I posted on all my social media feeds. I Instagrammed, I tweeted, I shared articles. I wrote a short video for my YouTube channel describing my feelings about the news. I filmed, edited, and posted it up online. A few hours of my “lazy” Sunday lost to work.

Then, I was defensive. Scrolling through all the comments on my video and social media, I passed by all the support and love, because all I could see today was the negativity. I locked onto all the posts saying “transgender people just want special treatment” or “trans people are already given protections because they’re mentally ill” or the always eloquent “THEIR R ONLY TOO GENDRS” comment. I clapped back, writing away as I pointed out all their ill-conceived arguments and thinly-veiled transphobia, all as my Sunday afternoon slipped away.

Then, I was worried. I met some friends at a local street fair but found myself ignoring the group’s conversation. Instead, I watched the people walking by, wondering if any of them shared my online harasser’s transphobia. Did my obviously transgender appearance make me an “other”? Was I out of place here? Was I just being tolerated as I walked down the street? I could feel their eyes staring at me as I walked by, taking an extra minute to try to figure me out. This was by no means new. I deal with that every day of my life as someone visibly transgender. Yet today, it felt more hostile and otherizing that usual. I left the fair early because I suddenly didn’t feel comfortable in such a public space.

Then, I was scared. As I drove home, I began to think… is this really my country? How can there be this many people who believe that I shouldn’t have the right to live the life that I choose? I have the right to narrate the story of my own body, but will I legally have that right? What if I got into a car accident right now? Would some doctor deny me care because I’m transgender? What if I tried to take a vacation in another country? Would my gender marker prevent me from coming back home? What about my future? Will I be legally allowed to become a parent, like I so desperately want one day? That last question hit me hard, and I began to cry as I drove down the freeway, the sun setting in the distance.

Then, I was heartbroken. I got home, fed my cat, warmed up leftover pizza, and turned on the next episode of Daredevil. Despite being in the same place as I had been just 24 hours earlier, everything felt completely different. I just want to live my life. I just want to know that my future is mine to define. Yet, I don’t know if that will ever be the case again. And I don’t know if I can stop that. Suddenly, my best friend, who also happens to be trans, texted me. They were scared for their future, just as I was. I couldn’t respond. I had no comfort to give. Instead, I turned off the light and climbed into bed.

In just 24 hours, I had run the emotional gamut. I felt exhausted, desperate to recharge. Yet, lying in the dark, I couldn’t sleep. My fear kept me awake, hours after I normally would have fallen asleep.

Those were all the emotions I went through upon hearing the news Sunday morning. And I’m an upper-middle-class white person living in Los Angeles, an area filled with supportive friends and communities. Imagine hearing that news while being the only trans person living in your rural community. Imagine hearing that news as a trans woman of color, who are consistently the most at-risk minority in the United States. Imagine being a young, scared teenager who just wishes to share their deepest secret with someone, anyone, and then hearing that the government meant to protect you is actively trying to deny you rights if you came out.

This isn’t the first time I’ve had to go through this entire cycle. I went through it after the 2016 election. I went through it after the transgender military ban announcement. I went through it after Betsy DeVos pulled Obama-era guidances that protected trans students. I went through it after being told I would die from AIDS by a woman in the grocery store. I went through it after being chased around the mall by a man yelling, “It’s a man. It’s a man.” I went through it when my gender non-conforming sister attempted suicide. I’ve been here numerous times before. And heaven knows, I’ll probably be here again. I’ll go through this whole damn cycle at some point in the future.

Don’t worry. I’ll find myself again. I promise. I will continue fighting the fight for the brighter future I know will come. But today, I honestly just can’t.

Today, I’m numb. I can’t feel anything. I just want to sit here, and do nothing. Yet, I can’t. I have to write this for you. I have to make you understand.

Today, more than any other, I need you. I need you to feel everything that I can’t. I need you to feel my anger. I need you to feel my sadness. My worries. My fear. I’m asking you to have what appears to be in short supply these days in America. Empathy.

Then, I’m asking that you fight for transgender people, just as we have tried our best to be there for you. I’m asking you to be my ally.

I’m asking you to feel what I feel. So that I don’t have to feel it all alone anymore.

JESSIE EARL is a video producer for The Advocate.

If you are a trans or gender-nonconforming person considering suicide Trans Lifeline can be reached at (877) 565-8860. LGBTQ youth (ages 24 and younger) can reach the Trevor Project Lifeline at (866) 488-7386. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at (800) 273-8255 can also be reached 24 hours a day by people of all ages and identities.