Lemon Pie in the Dark

This year was different, this year I didn’t pig out at Thankgiving,  This year I didn’t completely black out and eat an entire Chocolate Nativity Scene, includng baby Jesus (for the record-I’m not in the habit of eating baby Jesus’s-the basket was made out of a Cadbury egg-who knew Jesus was in there?).    I’m on Weight Watchers having bits of dessert.

Last weekend I attended a dessert party, where I ate small slices of cakes and pies and drank bottles of water .I was very proud of myself.   That was Friday night.   Since Friday, my dreams have been of desserts,  Chocolate houses and Gingerbread cookies dipped in chocolate.    So, yesterday, I thought if I had a black bottom muffin  from Freeport Bakery my cravings would go away.  But no…..      I had a dream about holding up a bakery…..’ I don’t want your cash-I want your eclairs”  If I were going to hold up a bakery, it would probably be Ettore’s, their pretty pricey but good.

The holidays are hell!   The goodies, the desserts.  At work there are boxes of See’s Candies.  And everyone tell you to eat, to stuff, to pig out. You have permission cause its Christmas.  The problem is recovery…  Some of us don’t, the gyms are full in January.  So far this season, I’ve done pretty well, WW allows you to eat like regular people.

The deep dish butter south has come to Sacramento, in the form of Grandma Young.    Grandma Young is old school, butter makes everything better.  Not just store bought butter, she like a special butter that cost five dollars a pound.  Grandma Young  gave her grandchildren a list,  11 pound of butter, special eggs, flour.  The sifting of flour begins tonight as a new generation will learn how to cook like a proper Oklahoman.

Grandma Young looked at me and said “oooh I can tell you like to eat”  (no kidding-I block out the sun)  “I bet your gonna like my ice box lemon pie” .    OMG! (that’s oh my god-for those over a certain age) my mom made Ice box lemon pie-its made with condensed milk and lemon juice on a buttery graham cracker crust and a foamy meringue. Once again OMG!   It was my favorite dessert.     Come over and eat with us Christmas….Sorry, I’m working, I said,  working on Christmas? -I’ll make sure Madaline makes you a plate.   I brought fresh beef and pork with me from Oklahoma-I always bring too much.  We gonna have fresh rolls and biscuits (kill me now) and she walked away,leaving me dizzy.

Here, she pushed a big mason jar into my chest- these are my peach preserves– from across the room I heard mmmmmmmmm.  Great, I thought, this women could very well kill me..   They can already see me from space..   Please lady, please!    I thanked her and she gave me that grandmother hug…..and I headed home.

I purposely left the peach preserves  in my trunk, cause they kept telling me to stop at Raley’s and pick up a can of Grands Biscuits….

The phone rings, as I try to catch the last half hour of the Peoples Court” …”hey brotha” my grandma wants to know if you have a large pyrex dish…    10×13?    Yes….   She is gonna make you a big ice box lemon pie…    oh jeez,I thought. Wow, thank her for me…   She likes you.

Well, I said to myself.  I could cut it up and share it with friends, Bull, that’s not gonna happen”  from the moment I sink a knife into that pie its on…    I could see myself, pulling down the shades, turning off all the lights and the TV and eating slowly… no light. slowly taking in the lemon,the theory being, if you cant see what your eating, there are no calories.

I have eaten many things in the dark. with my clothing tv ready, for a detergent commerical.   I have fallen alsleep to later find various pastas and meats stuck to various parts of my body.  And it came to no suprise when the postal service assigned a special zip code to for my wide screen ass.   Those days, I hope are behind me….

My pie will be ready for pick up on Friday, I’m thinking of having a few friends over and we can devour the pie together and it there is anything left-lights out.



Published by CityFella

Big city fella, Born and Raised in the San Francisco Bay Area. Lived in New York (a part time New Yorker) for three years . I have lived in the Sacramento area since 1993. When I first moved here, I hated it. Initially found the city too conservative for my tastes. A great place to raise children however too few options for adults . The city has grown up, there is much to do here. The city suffers from low self esteem in my opinion, locals have few positive words to say about their hometown. visitors and transplants are amazed at what they find here. From, the grand old homes in Alkali Flats, and the huge trees in midtown, there are many surprises in Sacramento. Theater is alive is this area . And finally ,there is a nightlife... In.downtown midtown, for the young and not so young. My Criticism is with local government. There is a shortage of visionaries in city hall. Sacramento has long relied on the state, feds and real estate for revenue. Like many cities in America,Downtown Sacramento was the hub of activity in the area. as the population moved to the suburbs and retail followed. The city has spent millions to revive downtown. Today less than ten thousand people live downtown. No one at city hall could connect the dots. Population-Retail. Business says Sacramento is challenging and many corporations have chosen to set up operations outside the cities limits. There is vision in the burbs. Sacramento has bones, there are many good pieces here, leaders seem unable or unwilling to put those pieces together into. Rant aside, I love it here. From the trees to the rivers. But its the people here that move me. Sacramento is one of the most integrated cities in America. I find I'm welcome everywhere. The spices work in this city of nearly 500,000 and for the most part these spices blend well together. From Ukrainians to Hispanics and a sizable gay community, all the spices seem to work well here. I frequently travel and occasionally I will venture into a city with huge racial borders, where its unsafe to visit after certain hours. I haven't found it here. I cant imagine living in a community where there is one hue or one spice. I love the big trees, Temple Coffee House, the Alhambra Safeway, Zelda's Pizza, Bicyclist in Midtown, The Mother Lode Saloon, Crest Theater, and the Rivers. I could go on and I might. Sacramento is home.

7 thoughts on “Lemon Pie in the Dark

    1. Tricia B

      No discrepect, The photo was a past and copy from Google, its is also on Yahoo, and Bing. Simply type, Ice Box Lemon Pie. You can control cut and pasting by encoding your pictures to or place a water mark with your name or logo. As it stand everyone has full access to photos.on the search engines and to cut and paste the content ., did get a chance to view your blog and you have a gift and some great receipes…….Cityfella


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