Costco Crazy

First thing first, I love shopping,I hate crowds.  I love shopping online in the comfort of my “Fruit of the Looms”

So why am I out  at a Costco a gloomy Saturday afternoon?    Ninja.  I am there for a Ninja Blending system.  The Ninja was on sale, a sale ending Sunday,and there is no way in hell am I going to Costco on a Sunday.

Getting into the Cal Expo Costco was frustrating.Tons of traffic-its Saturday.  A crazy lady in a Volkswagen Passat makes a U-turn in front of me and then stops,putting on her flashers WHICH makes no sense at all seeing that she is in front of the parking space she wants.

Its its only been five minutes and I am screaming in the car.

U turns,the front, the back, the sides there is no parking spaces available.

But I am on a mission from GOD!

After 34 fun filled minutes, I find a park on the south side of the store near the Tire Center.

I can see carts are in short supply so I scoop mine from a nearby parking stall.

Entering the store, there is a man clearly overjoyed with a 75 inch Samsung TV on his flat bed cart.   He is watching it as if it were a newborn child. Random men are giving him high fives….and he is all smiles.

I know where my Ninja is, I missed it the last time it was on sale.  I pass the photo area and dart up the far right aisle.  and I make a sharp left,  my baby is waiting for me.

Wait, I see the display, but no Ninja or jas.

Shasbut !  I turn on to the the main aisle, heading to membership services.. I am a whale going upstream. People are going right,left.   What is this Ikea?

At membership, a woman is going on about the expiration date of her membership. she doesn’t buy much and goes into details about the things she has purchased at Costco (who cares lady-lets go already! damm)  I am hopeful at the other position, everyone is all smiles, no stories about the olden days.  A small child is lying flat on the floor.    Only one person is ahead of me,an impatient man is yelling at her-he wants to go.   She wants to know if a larger size shirt is available? (At Costco) good luck with that.    The man at the counter waved his hand and poof she was gone.    My turn

Ninja Please?

The computer says we have 22 of them, the man says.  Didn’t see um. I say.  He called someone to help me. The man is there in a flash,were off,he is a professional, navigating the crowded aisle with the skill of a football player.   Meanwhile, I am trying to keep up with a giant cart without power steering.  Nearly took out a child.

He picks up the same, display I picked up. Tilt, the computer is wrong. They are Ninja free.  Now its time to return to membership.

I am amazed how good natured everyone is in Costco.  Everyone I encountered smiled.  Says a lot about a company.

Back at membership the  man makes a sound effect as I approach the counter, Ninja right?   Can I get it online, yes?  What is the closest Costco near you….he asks…. This one, I say.   He said, well according to my computer there are 94 in Roseville.   Roseville? I respond, shoot me in the head.  No way I am going to the madness called Roseville, the other guy chuckles.   He says listen, there are 119 in South Sac, go tomorrow, be there when the store opens.   I agreed.

I decided since I was there, I would shop for food.  Thanksgiving food, dinner food and get other supplies.   It went smoother that I expected.  There was no wait at check out and I thought I’d order a Chicken Salad outside for dinner.

Que Scary Music…

Wouldn’t you know it… a line.    Most of the windows were closed… People are waiting for their food, not happily.   A woman is bumping my sizable ass with her shopping cart. I look back and she gives me an insincere sorry.  Bump again. oooookay…. Bump, I turn around and I look into her eyes and  I put my hand on her cart and I hold on to it- at this time she realizes she was in danger and after a couple of minutes, I released her cart.  No more bumps

I’m in the wrong friggin line, Id prepaid for my salad.  Should be in the pre-paid line.

I showed them my receipt and my salad is in my hand in mega seconds.  Now I am trapped.  People with their  full carts are in various stages of conversation. I can not get out.

Excuse me, was ignored. I abandon my cart and walked up to a group of women an said I need to get out.!  They moved their four carts and baby stroller and freedom.

I can get my Ninja online but at full price.   After my experience at Cal Expo, there isn’t a way in hell I was going on Sunday.   I will wait for it to go on sale again and shop Costco when its meant to be shopped,on a Monday or Tuesday evening after the holidays