No More Buffets!

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“I’m not a germaphobe but some people are just nasty and inconsiderate and should be waterboarded 

“Could be a word-waterboarded”

A couple of years ago my janky glasses (held together by two paperclips)  fell into a  salad bowl at a chain buffet. I reported it to the two girls working behind the counter. I was concerned about other people sharing my DNA. They looked at me as if I was speaking a foreign language and said its okay, and did nothing.

It absolutely kills me to watch people pick and sample the food as they walk down the buffet line. Children wiping their noses and randomly touching food with their grubby little fingers with their parents in full view.     I told one woman her daughter was putting her hands in the food and she angrily frowned at me. I saw this child earlier crawling on the ground.  I’ve watched people sneeze directly into the food.  ( In my mind-I’m saying to myself. Well I wont be having that!)

 Tongs are KRYPTONITE to a lot of these people.

Cause we all know, EVERYONE who uses the restroom, wash their hands before leaving!

Recently I was at a hotel.   And despite ALL the serving spoons, All the forks and tongs etc.  A lady with a small dog  was reaching into the cheese and other items with her hand (often double dipping) feeding her happy, happy, happy, pooch as I watch her K9 lick her fingers. I said to myself, the rest of the world be dammed.  I’m sure in her mind, it was perfectly fine, they do it all the time.

But Bitch you ain’t at home!

Put a BIG AZZ fork in me, I’m Done with Buffets!

I left my food on the counter and went to a nearby restaurant.

I hope I haven’t offended anyone with children and animals.

But I don’t want their germ ridden fingers and paws in my food.