Online Dating: She spent two years online with a man she never met

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This is a repost of an 2012 article :I Wasted 2 Years on a Man I Never Met

By Laurie Sandell, in New York City


.I remember the first e-mail I received from Jamie; it wasn’t exactly poetic. “Hello, you sound interesting,” he wrote. Looking back, it’s hard to believe what that simple line would lead to.

He’d sent his note via At the time, I was nearing 30 and working as a secretary at a big investment bank in New York City — not exactly the fulfillment of a lifelong dream. Checking my inbox was the highlight of my day. So I checked out his profile immediately, but wrote him off just as fast — he lived in the Midwest and, more importantly, hadn’t posted a photo. “Sorry, I’m not interested,” I replied. He persisted and e-mailed a few snapshots, along with a note. Turns out he was reasonably cute, and really funny.

We started shooting flirty e-mails back and forth. This went on for a couple of weeks until I said, “So, do you want to come to New York for a date?” Suddenly, his e-mails stopped. For two days, I heard nothing. Then he wrote: “Listen, I’m sorry. I really screwed up. I’m not looking for a relationship; I was just trying to have some e-mail fun.”

“E-mail fun? E-MAIL FUN??” I wrote. Furious, I deleted every last one of his notes.

A few weeks later, he resurfaced. “Let me explain myself,” he began. “Ever since my father died, I’ve been terrified to get too close to anyone . . .”


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Published by CityFella

Moved to the Big Tomata in the nineties from San Francisco. No Suburbs for me with its single colored houses and lawns and the excitement of pulling out my trash can once a week. I'm a CityFella , a part time New Yorker. I'm happiest in the Center City where people the streets and people are alive. I'm still waiting to buy a 34th floor condo somewhere downtown/Midtown with a nightclub. "Hurry I'm old" My politics are somewhere in the middle with a needle that constantly moves. I'm too liberal to be a Republican and too conservative to be a Democrat. Everything interests me . I've come to love Sacratomato, Its a nice town in cheap sensible shoes .

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