Turkey on Turkey Day? No Thanks! “Sorry not Sorry”

Tomorrow, there will be complete meltdowns, screaming, shouting and possibly fighting all over America  The Holiday season is perfect, for year long or permanent resentments because you chose to have Thanksgiving with the in laws or another family.   Someone may resent your absence . The fact that you couldn’t afford the flight this year is unimportant. Its Thanksgiving!

In some families, the Traditional dinner is paramount.   The menu and the preparation is the same year after year.  In a black family, in addition to Turkey and stuffing are greens beans, sweet potato pie,   and other desserts. (but don’t get crazy)

She was one of six girls.  For Thanksgiving she made Brazilian Fried greens with sweet onions, tomato and peppers.  It is absolutely delicious.  However this deviation from the traditional preparation caused a major revolt in her family and her aunt tossed the greens into the garbage without trying them, hurting her feelings.  Dinner was delayed as some of the  women went out on Thanksgiving day and bought new greens.  Many of her family members made fun of her throughout the day in front of her husband and children, she never returned to any family function.

The Thanks in Giving!

Bucking Tradition is dangerous in some families.  If you don’t like Turkey or simply would like a change in the menu, buckle up!  Prepare to be interrogated by everyone including the pets.  Everyone eats Turkey on thanksgiving so whats wrong with you!   Are you a communist or part of some freeky cult?   Its like being a Vegan at a barbecue.  Your black!  Black people eat meat!   Eyes following you where ever you go .   “What’s wrong with him!”

Where is the Thanks in Giving!  Many people, families only get together during holidays.   Is it about the food or the gathering?  Most people under 25 would be fine with a pizza or an burger. One of my families best Thanksgiving experiences was at a random Burger King on I-5 on route to Central California.  We all wore those silly King hats and ordered until everyone was full.  The evening ended with a cold french fry fight.

TRADITION: Tonight I know a family who will spend the entire night making Tamales. Last Thanksgiving, a Ukrainian family shared fish with me.  Some are barbecuing a Turkey, and instead of stuffing/dressing they are serving beans.  AND NO ONE DIED!

Some families rotate locations during the holidays, another home can create their own menu during the holidays.

With days un-promised. I’m there for the gathering.  If your Thanksgiving  dinner is a peanut butter sandwich. thank you for sharing it with me.    I know many people in my neighborhood who would be grateful to have THAT sandwich.

 I am thankful,  We are blessed to spend another holiday together.


This year I will be working on Turkey day.  And while  I cant participate in the gatherings. My friends are making sure I wont go without.  One friend is making a large Porterhouse Steak. with fried onions.  Another friend is dropping off a smaller version of her award winning Turkey pie. Dessert will be refrigerated Toll House Cookies.


Through the years, we have invited friends who live alone who might feel out of place at a family gathering to another venue. A movie or walk.  We often join another friend who’s family tradition is distributing food to the needy,

If your focus is the dinner and where people bringing of sitting, you might be missing the meaning of the holiday.

I refuse to get caught up in the traditions of the holiday.  I avoid over complicated joyless households where how to be is more important then simply kicking back and enjoying the day and each other.  Sorry not Sorry.

Live each minute as if it was your last on earth


Published by CityFella

Big city fella, Born and Raised in the San Francisco Bay Area. Lived in New York (a part time New Yorker) for three years . I have lived in the Sacramento area since 1993. When I first moved here, I hated it. Initially found the city too conservative for my tastes. A great place to raise children however too few options for adults . The city has grown up, there is much to do here. The city suffers from low self esteem in my opinion, locals have few positive words to say about their hometown. visitors and transplants are amazed at what they find here. From, the grand old homes in Alkali Flats, and the huge trees in midtown, there are many surprises in Sacramento. Theater is alive is this area . And finally ,there is a nightlife... In.downtown midtown, for the young and not so young. My Criticism is with local government. There is a shortage of visionaries in city hall. Sacramento has long relied on the state, feds and real estate for revenue. Like many cities in America,Downtown Sacramento was the hub of activity in the area. as the population moved to the suburbs and retail followed. The city has spent millions to revive downtown. Today less than ten thousand people live downtown. No one at city hall could connect the dots. Population-Retail. Business says Sacramento is challenging and many corporations have chosen to set up operations outside the cities limits. There is vision in the burbs. Sacramento has bones, there are many good pieces here, leaders seem unable or unwilling to put those pieces together into. Rant aside, I love it here. From the trees to the rivers. But its the people here that move me. Sacramento is one of the most integrated cities in America. I find I'm welcome everywhere. The spices work in this city of nearly 500,000 and for the most part these spices blend well together. From Ukrainians to Hispanics and a sizable gay community, all the spices seem to work well here. I frequently travel and occasionally I will venture into a city with huge racial borders, where its unsafe to visit after certain hours. I haven't found it here. I cant imagine living in a community where there is one hue or one spice. I love the big trees, Temple Coffee House, the Alhambra Safeway, Zelda's Pizza, Bicyclist in Midtown, The Mother Lode Saloon, Crest Theater, and the Rivers. I could go on and I might. Sacramento is home.

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