“Say it; forget it. Post it regret it.”

Social Media and the need to be noticed has ruined millions of lives.  Before social media we called a friend and ranted.  Today, I’m embarrassed for friends and family members who go online to vent and later get caught up in a storm when people disagree with their words.

In a need for attention, most people do not vet their friends online. To some, having  hundreds or thousands of freinds is prestigious.  To get 100 hundred likes on the picture they posted.   This has made it easier for employers and some unscupulous people to gain access to someones personal thoughts and actions .

A few years ago I was asked to check the backgrounds on prospective employers.  One particular man interviewed well he was one of the two men considered for the position.   I friended him on Facebook using a female name and using a picture I found on google.  With in a couple of hours I was one a many Fackbook freinds.

On his  timeline there were many pictures of females in swimsuites.   The  fifty something man, had several pictures of himself  kissing women ,some cases squeezing their breasts .  Needless to say he didn’t get the mid six figure job.

I’m far from perfect, as a divorced male, I have taken scary shirtless pictures  and posted  silly pictures social media.   Before I hit the enter button ,I think of how this picture would effect my children, wonder if I could I explain the picture to friends, or to an HR department.   I know once I hit enter my picture no longer belongs to me, it belongs to the Universe and those people who want to cut and paste it.

Monday January 15, 2018 (Martin Luther King Day)

 University of Alabama freshman and  Alpha Phi member Harley Barber  posted a couple video’s on  Instagram.  The first video was posted in the restroom of a  popular college bar. The second video was shot in the car of friends.  This is a edited version of the second video.

Ms Barber, like many on social media thought by creating a fake account only a few people would see it.   She and others should read up on the downfall on Anthony Weiner, who on two occasions thought he was sending picture to people who would NEVER share his photos.

Racist? Harley Barber vs President Donald Trump

A lot of people call her a racist based on her video.  I’m not so quick to make that leap.  No one has come forward and said they have heard Donald Trump call anyone nigger.   Yet we know he is racist.  Based on his actions (discrimination) and words.  He said a federal Judge couldn’t be partial because he was Mexican.  He has disparaged other races and religons and no one(so far  has come forward and said they have heard him say Nigger or negative word about another race.

While its been a long time, I remember being 17,18,19. and wanting to fit in.  She said “She didn’t care if was Martin Luther King Day, nigger, nigger, nigger.” “I’m in the south now bitch, so everyone can fuck off.”   What I hear is a lot of posturing.

Hold on!  I’m not giving her a pass! 

From what I’ve read, she trouble!  She was kicked out of Catholic School.  Her mother told the press ,she forced her daughter to move out last year because she is disrespectful. “ I made her move out in mid December 2016 due to her lack of respect for everyone and everything.”

So there she is in a new setting, finding her way.   In Marlton, New Jersey she may have had a bad bitch following.  However in  Tuscaloosa, Alabama she was just some freshman from somewhere New Jersey.   On Monday, she showed  her new friends (via Instagram) in Alabama she was a badass!    She could say nigger like them!

(Many people from the north and on the coast’s assume the south has racism on lock- I find they are just real about it.  On the coast’s one never knows) 

Grey

That little itty bitty video, that she thought would be seen by her group of friends was leaked.  Perhaps by someone who was offended by her words.  A person who has a black nephew, or cousin or close friend.

The world has changed in the last 50 years. The color lines are blurred.  That old white guy in the Black Lives Matter march has a black grandson who he concerned about.

Because of my dark skin, people assume that all my family members look like me.  My family is black, white, Latin, and Asian.  My children are bi-racial.  A racist of any hue may find me cold and unresponsive to their hatred and generalizations.

My former wife worked for an office where the majority of her colleagues used racist terms including nigger    She is less vocal than I. However in her own quiet way she was more effective.    She took various pictures of  me and the children and selected picture of her extended  black family and placed them on her desk.  The racial slurrs ended in the office.

Harley Barber’s Future 

The University of Alabama expelled her.  The Alpha Phi’s dropped her like a hot glass.  I dobut few of her sorority sisters are reaching out to her because she is tainted.  While she lives in an upper income community in New Jersey.  New Jersey isn’t Montana, over 30% of the state populations is people of color.  Ms Barber rant has tainted relationships. Family friendships with people of color.   People they know are questioning the parents racism. Are they?

At nineteen she doesn’t fully get it.  She doesn’t understand why there is such a BIG deal. In her mind, all African Americans call each other nigga.   Many of her white freinds call each other nigga. That’s the way people speak!   But in the next few months/years she will feel the full effect of her words.

Should she apply to another unversity and that institution googles her name.   When she applies for a job and where there  are African American she will wonder if they have seen the video.   If she applys for any significant job, and they do a background check. She will be the girl who said fuck niggers.

She has closed down her social media.and deleted the videos and yet video lives on.

“Say it; forget it. Post it regret it.”

The Aftermath

Not sure how this video/recording was attained.  Harley is having a converstation with someone (who could have recorded this) and sharing her story …its very interesting.

 There are more than 250 copies or her video’s with more than 20 million views.   This is superstar terrority.

Once more in small type

“Say it; forget it. Post it regret it.”

Tell a friend

Cityfella