Is this thing on? “He’s Asian trapped in an White Body”


 

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The majority of the population in Hawaii is Asian.   For a brief moment,  Congressman Ed Case of Hawaii lost his mind when he said he was an “Asian trapped in a white body.”  to the Asian and Pacific Islander members of the new Congress. 

These tibets are not uncommon when some individuals are not totally comfortable the being a minority in a setting.

 

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Through the years, some Caucasian men has randomly said to me “Some people think I’m black, you know how I walk, talk, when I tan, I’m really dark”   

A co-worker many years ago said, that there are white niggers? 

 

In our super quick zero to 

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rush to judgement world!

I don’t believe that the congressman or any of these people that I described are RACIST’S.

 

It is something learned over time.  When you are exposed (socialize outside the work place ) you’ll soon realize we are the same.  Overtime you’ll become more comfortable with others from different culture’s and backgrounds.

 

Ed Case, is mega embarrassed over his comments. like other el stupido comments when we learn better we do better.

 

For now, I hope he’s okay being white.

 

CityFella

 

 

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Sold my soul for a case of “Bit of Honey”


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My niece said, they’re auditioning at the Hilton, you should go. Even though I hadn’t seen or heard of the show, I said okay.

The medium sized meeting room was filled with perspective contestants and staff, who asked you about yourself and hobbies. When they asked me had I’d seen the show, I figured I was doomed. But no one gave me the heave ho and We saw a video of the show and played a mock version of the show. I was terrible.

When I was younger, my mother and I would occasionally drive down to LA to see the taping of some of the shows like Johnny Carson, Laverne and Shirley and various game shows. The game shows were lucrative, because they gave audience members a fist full of tickets to entice us to sit through the hours of taping. It was common for them to tape ten to fourteen shows a day. We came home with Tee Shirts, Electric Can Opener and cash.it was grueling.

I had long forgotten about Face the Music when they called and told me to come down to LA. Bring changes of clothing and expect to stay 14 hour a day. I had no expectations of winning a car or a ton of cash, I was just excited to be on TV.

My wife and I rented an Oldsmobile Cutlass and drove down to LA, where we stayed in a seedy hotel on Hollywood Boulevard near the Sunset Studios. I convinced her, the long day would be worth it because of the cash and prizes.

FORT KNOX

We arrived to the studio. As I was walking away, my wife remembered I had the rental car keys and the room keys and as she was walking towards me to retrieve the keys, she was blocked by two security guards. Who took the keys from me, and put them in an envelope, sealed the envelope and gave the sealed envelope to my wife, who was less than fifteen feet away.

HOME

In my mind, we would tape then break for lunch. I was assigned to a waiting area with other contestants ,where we were told the rules. We had to sign various releases including one very scary release that said, if the show was preempted in one of the five largest markets, we would forfeit our prizes. So if there was a national emergency, I could kiss my 1980 Ford Pinto goodbye.

We all learned that home during the taping would be this large room in a loft in the studio, where there was a dressing area, two restrooms and a large lighted mirror. The contestants were encouraged to entertain ourselves and watch the taping on a portable TV.

CHOW

There were snacks for us A large steel can held the IRIS soft drinks, coffee was in a large teachers coffee pot. with an orange light. Lunch on the first day was fried chicken, poured into another large steel can lined with a black garbage bag and chips. Napkins were our plates. No one complained.

FACE THE MUSIC

Face the Music was produced Sandy Frank, who was responsible for the very successful “Name that Tune”. The twist, however, was that in addition to identifying the songs that the orchestra played, the contestants had to link the song titles to famous people, places, and things. (Remember. I sucked here) The Host was Ron Ely, who was best known for his loin cloth in TV’s Tarzan. Way, way, wayyyy back in 1966. The Singer was Lisa Donovan who’s trademark move was twisting her shoulders at the beginning of every show. Her twisting slowly took over the room. By the end of the first evening all of us were twisting with Lisa

OLD MATH AND HARSH REALITY

They called us for the show. People traveled from Washington State to be on the show. There were nearly eighty of us. Two new contestants for each show meant, only 28 would get on if they taped fourteen shows. If!

My reality changed after realizing that I wasn’t guaranteed to get on. After I told everyone I was going to be on. “Fuck”

I was one of six black contestants. One brotha, names Eugene, killed it and became the champion. While we should be happy for him, all we felt was dread. You never seen blacks on one game show in those days. Eugene went on to win three other shows. They taped 11 shows that day.

My new wife, was disappointed that I didn’t get on. To make matters worse, the audience prizes were mostly tee shirts.

SELLING OUR SOULS FOR BIT OF HONEY

Several times a day the producers would visit the loft. The staff, asked us to chant their names as they walked up the stairs, the chants would grow louder as the producers got closer to the room, when the the door open there as absolute pandemonium, we were jumping up and down.

These were all self respecting people who would never act this way. ANYWHERE! But we wanted to get on, so we tossed aside our self respect and screamed they way the told us too.

By the second and final day, I was depressed. I kept it to myself. Even with the announcement they were going to tape 14 shows, did nothing to relieve my sadness. I told everyone I was going to be on TV, and now it looks likes its not going to happen.

Eugene, who came out of top for four episodes, lost in the the pivotal fifth episode which would have guaranteed him a new car. I felt bad for wanting him to lose.

In the room, you could feel the disappointment. I even sang a sad song that make a couple of people cry.

At one point, they asked us to come downstairs. Showtime, was shooting a documentary (I think) featuring game show contestants. We all signed releases without looking. When the cameras were on me, I told them how excited I was to be on and how well we were treated (All lies)

We returned to more chicken. I sat staring at set. There was no more Lisa Donovan Twist. Just as I started to settle into my reality, I wasn’t going to be on. They called my name.

The other contestants made me feel important even though I would never see them again. The brotha worked on my Natural, others made sure every thing was perfect. No one had to coach me about my energy. I was ready.

When Ron Ely asked what I did? In song, I said I was an opera singer. My colleagues at the insurance company where I worked as clerk, teased me about that for months.

(An Opera, what?)

I didn’t make it past the first round, BUT, I was a hit, with pats on the back from staffers and the female producer. I got carried away by the laughs in the audience. Ron Ely, told me to settle down. But who was he? I was a hit!

My consolation prize was a selection of Bulova Clocks and a Case of Bit of Honey.

The car was especially quiet leaving the studio. Then all of sudden “Wedding Ring” WEDDING RING!! WEDDING RING!!! my wife is screaming! Was the answer, to the question. I made the mistake and said, I know! HOW COULD YOU NOT KNOW WEDDING RING!!! We have only been married a few months. WED-DING RING!

An unscheduled stop at Del-Taco, reduced the temperature of the car.

GAME SHOWS

I have auditioned for several games shows. From the Zoo like atmosphere of the Price is Right, to Card Sharks, I was called by three of the four shows I auditioned for. But the more I thought about the degradation and making a complete fool of myself, and decided against it.

If can’t say if this is the experience at all game shows, but I was one and done.

My prize arrived six months later, I was Bit O Honey for world

Every now and then I will get a call from someone who has seen me on Face The Music, on Game Show Network and other Cable channels and I walk away, we no regrets. While all my children know that I’m crazy, I wish I could get a copy of the episode so they might share it with their children

See you on Cable

CityFella

Can’t get no Satisfaction: 79 year old calls Police on Hookers


He tried, they tried, he tried, he tried, but Bill couldn’t get no SATISFACTION.

Bill is a 79 year old man, living in a Cleveland, Ohio suburb, hired two Black Service girls (Hookers) for sexual services.   Bill laid out five hundred George Washington’s for their services. The duo didn’t meet his expectations.  Unlike Sears he didn’t get a guarantee leaving Bill displeased.     Bill dialed 911, to complain.

He told the Police he was robbed!!

By the time the Po Po arrived the service girls were gone.   Bill told the police he had met the fortyish women through a friend in Cleveland.

While Bill believed he had been victimized, the officers explained that while he didn’t get SATISFACTION, it didn’t constitute an actual robbery attempt.

What Bill didn’t know, solicitation of prostitution is a misdemeanor.

The Po Po cut him a break .

On January 3rd, Bill tried and he tried, and he tried, and he tried, but Bill couldn’t get no SATISFACTION

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

President Trumps last pitch for Wall, or Fence or Poster


Sarah Huckabee Sanders was smacked down by Fox News, Chris Matthews on Sunday.

After a humiliating blow to Senate Republicans, Mitch McConnell is giving the Prez a big FU!    He isn’t sending anything unless its pre-signed by the Prez.

The Republican Senators up for re-election next year are defecting to the dark side (The Democrats) by the hour wanting the Government to reopen.

Today  the Billionaire who has probably never been in a Supermarket .says he can feel the pain of the people who aren’t getting paid this week.  “I can relate, and I’m sure that the people that are on the receiving end will make adjustments — they always do — and they’ll make adjustments,” 

2 day, Da Prez is going on TV to save face.   The deal maker who has filed bankruptcy a half a dozen times ,who has lost millions because someone dared to remove his name from a Casino is  going to take 10 minutes to tug at your heart strings and why we need a partial wall to protect us from Godzilla, and Spongeball Square Pants.

Expect, spontaneous facts, and could be truths.  The Press will not be able to harass the Prezy Poo with silly insulting questions.  Real Facts or Fake News is to be avoided at all costs.  So well just have to take his word……

No one can fact check him later today . The fact that there is no evidence that Terrorist enter via our southern borders, they Fly Southwest and United with your nana.   Things like How could a partial wall, or poster protect us when it is estimated 35 billion dollars is needed to fully protect us?   Can’t someone simply walk around a partial wall, fence or poster. So, if I were a drug merchant, rapist, or terrorist, wouldn’t it be more advantageous to simply walk were the wall, fence or poster isn’t?  (the world is spinning)

No one mention Mexico, let forget the chants, the promise that American needn’t worry our collective heads as Meh-he-co was paying for it!   OMG that was sooo 20-sixteen!  I-phone seven or eight ewwww !

emergency nounoften attributive

Definition of emergency 

  1. an unforeseen combination of circumstances or the resulting state that calls for immediate action
  2. an urgent need for assistance or relief (the mayor declared a state of emergency after the flood)

According to Prezy.  We are in wall state of Emergency

But there are questions, that won’t be asked……………

Why is it an emergency in 2018/2019?

Why wasn’t it important, two years ago, when the Republicans controlled both houses?


Later in the week he is going to the border to pick out the bad guys against the wishes of his adviser in chief  Ann Coulter who said in a tweet: Trump GOING TO THE BORDER is beyond moronic.  Does he need to meet with a cancer patient before deciding to fund cancer research?”

Its all about his base, bout his base, bout his base, no treble!

He WAS prepared to go the distance.  To partially honor is campaign promise.  Some members  of his Party said, you can go the distance, alone.  He doesn’t mind getting push back from California, Wisconsin, and New York, they can all kick rocks.   But his base in Kentucky, West Virginia, Montana, who are hanging in with him with the Chinese Tariffs. (ouch) However if the government remains closed through next month, some of his base wont receive food stamps, wont receive farm subsidies.   He loves his base, as they unlike the rest of us, love him unconditionally and he needs their support.   I think the wall goes…

 

News at 11

CityFella

 

The Real Housewives of Atlanta S11 ep8: Did someone call somebodies mama a B?


 

What a difference a year makes.  This time last season I was dreading reviewing #RHOA, with its sad storylines that went no where and while nothing spectacular has happened this season, it has been more entertaining then the silly scream fest of last season.

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Kenya Moore’s pumps are hard to fill , love her or hate her she brought the drama. This season the drama has been assigned to Marlo Hampton’s size elevens.  While I’m not a big fan of Marlo’s I’m bout ready for them to give her the damm peach. (almost)   At this point, I don’t think anyone would miss Shamari Devoe or Tanya Sam.   Eva Marcille is this seasons shady sniper with memory loss (she seems to forget her shade when people question her) is iffy.   The big question is Nene Leakes, with Gregg’s illness, will she be back next year…. But that’s next year.

Last nights episode was good and smooth, a few bumps and a lot of light shade.  The rain in Destin Florida, kept the girls inside.

Boiling up: Earlier, Shamari had insisted that she only wore an outfit Marlo picked out for her to 'shut her up' and 'humor her,' and initially seemed thrilled with the whoops the look got from the other women

Shamari’s fashion sense has been an issue since she burst out on scene.  Marlo, who in her mind is the source of everything. Insisted Shamari wear something from her closet. Marlo is a beefy gal and Shamari is petite, while it looked nice it was like taking a drop cloth from a big SUV and putting on a Corolla.

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Bitch Stole My Talent 

A Nene Leakes Production

A talent show that pits two ladies together in the (who does it/wears it best vain)

First up, was the Fashionista extra Marlo Hampton vs that new comer Tanya Sam. Marlo came out in a romper and matching hat. But it was Tanya who took it all with a surprise multi fashion number.   As Tanya was describing her outfit, she mentioned  that she is doing a “high-low” look in terms of price point, with her sunglasses, which happen to be from Nene’s Swagg Boutique, representing for the “low.  While there was no intentional shade, Nene wasn’t feeling it.

Next up, was America’s Top Model Eva Marcille and the woman Eva  said had a Veteran Walk ,Cynthia Bailey.  First this first, what the shit was Eva wearing, with her butt cheeks playing peeka boo and not in the nice way.  It wasn’t even close, the Veteran body slammed her.    ‘Thank you Eva for warming up the runway. I’m the next Top Model now. Let me call Tyra and tell her,’ said the Veteran.

Shades on: 'Thank you Eva for warming up the runway. I'm the next Top Model now. Let me call Tyra and tell her,' Cynthia teased her friend who won season 3 of that show

Next singing:  I really, really,realllley, like Kandi Burruss.  You know where I’m going right! (Good!)  Shamari sang “Eye of the Sparrow.  Kandi (we love chu girl) picked some unrecognizable shit she wrote.  There was no contest. None, no questions what so NEVAH!!!   Shamari, kicked ass.

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In the last round: Who is the best host.  Nene or Porsha?  Do I need to say anymore? Ok good.

Porsha

Porsha is keeping her pregnancy under wraps.  Her last pregnancy ended in a miscarriage and she really wants to tell her family before telling the housewives.  The ladies split up later in the day.  With Kandi, Shamari, and Eva doing flying Pilates and Nene, Tanya, Marlo and Cynthia getting massages .  Porsha, went to bed went to with a headache.

Porsha knew the fact she wasn’t drinking would be an issue.  So she poured coke and apple juice (yuck) in a bottle of Hennessy to throw the ladies off.   She told them she was doing an alcohol cleanse.   A few of the ladies questioned Porsha’s behavior.  Her weight gain, snacking on pickles.        Marlo blurted out  Porsha’s pregnant.   Some of the ladies agreed as they reviewed the day.   Nene, confronted Porsha,and Porsha poured .

“Dinner”

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At dinner, a thrilled Nene kept her secret.  While the ladies were having champagne Porsha drank her concoction in front of the girls.

Your a Bitch, they’re a Bitch, Every body is a Bitch Bitch Bitch…… 

Shamari wont let it go!   Now she is pissed about Marlo going into  her room and helping her with her fashion.   (say it with me, BITCH!!!)  Marlo didn’t come in there with a gun.  Shamari, attempting to piss Marlo off, said  Tanya helped her dress for dinner.  Marlo comes back and said  anyone at THAT table could have helped Shamari dress better than she does.

While Shamari tries to bring it in.   Marlo turbo has kicked in  .  Shamari calls Marlo a bitch, not once but several times.   Little petite Shamari ain’t no punk!!!!     Its clear Marlo don’t scare her.   Marlo asked Shamari to call her a bitch again!   Shamari, happily called Marlo a bitch!   Marlo zero to 60 in point something seconds said  Ya Mama’s a bitch!   Shamari says,  NO your Mom’s a bitch!  Shamari finally asking: ‘So we’re just gonna keep going back and forth like we’re in high school and call each other bitches?’ 
  I’m sorry to say, I’m a juvenile!    I’m just glad I threw a tissue instead of my drink can at the flat screen.   Shamari took it well and earned some Big Azz Bonus points..  Take some notes Eva.  

The dinner couldn’t end without Nene taking a shot at Tanya.  Tawking about her sto. No weaves or wigs were pulled in the episode…

Your thoughts…….

CityFella

Last Week

Eva bridal shower had every thing except Nene

(click on the link below for the full story)

https://sacratomatovillepost.com/2018/12/17/the-real-housewives-of-atlanta-s11-ep7-nene-thank-you-for-being-a-friend-eva/

,

 

merry STUPID christmas (self inflected wounds)


 

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Its 2018, another year filled with stupid adults who shouldn’t leave their homes without professional supervision.

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Despite all the warnings, every year shoppers fill the cars with gifts and return to the mall to shop.  Once their shopping is completed they return to an empty car with a broken window.   At an Sacramento area mall yesterday.  The victim thought the security camera would protect their belongings.  His wife, wants the mall to replace the items since the crime happen on their property.   Many of the victims will not take responsibility for their stupidly. These crimes will happen in all the best neighborhoods, shopping malls, hotels, parking garages and airports this weekend. With Common Sense missing in action.

Stupid on Parade 

Why brave the crowds at the malls, when people make it so easy for thieves to simply break a window. Everyone at their (the thieves) home will be genuinely surprised at Christmas.

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They broke into my car?  I was just gone a minute!  Yes, I left my purse on the front seat, but I locked the door.  I’m not totally stupid! 

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I think we packed everything, my Camera his meds.  Were so excited we haven’t seen our children in months.   Everything is packed and on the porch so we’ll be ready in the morning.

Stock Photo - Suitcase and satchel on porch. Fotosearch - Search Stock Images, Mural Photographs, Pictures, and Clipart Photos

I left my car running, I always do  I was just running into the store for some cigs.  Someone just took my car!!!   Its Fucking Christmas, who does that? 

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“This is Ridiculous” (all these people)

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We missed out flight. It wasn’t my fault, NOT ONE PERSON would let our family go ahead of them! 

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We told the hotel,we would arrive at 8:07 where are they?

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Do you mind, if I go in front of you?

I only have two items…….

My family are on their way and I have no food at home….

I have a fear of crowds……

My elderly parents are in the car…………

I just can’t wait in this crazy ass long line….

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There is room over there, to the right, My RIGHT DAMMIT!!!  

This is Crazy, all these people!  

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Be smart this Christmas

CityFella

The Real Housewives of Atlanta S11 ep6 ” “She said she is THAT B!’


You have to give to Bravo, sometimes the directors are shadier than the castmates. Tonight’s episode was okay, nothing earth shattering. However for me, your big old shady blogger its was all about Yovanna, a friend of Nene.

Nene and Gregg were hosting a couples party “Boobs and Bourbon. This year it wasn’t held at the Leakes (all white) compound, where would be grown ups spilled drinks and messed up

At this event there are new people, old friends, other halves, Eva and her fiance Michael, Marlo date wasn’t in a wheel chair and breathing mask, he was a fortyish caucasian (that some suspect was a member of production crew (that why we didn’t hear how they met) but he has a nice smile and good disposition.

We get to see Tanya (the new girl) and her fiance Paul, Porsha officially brings Dennis, who abandoned his ATL hip hop swag and came in dressed like an black insurance man who works in a Irish neighborhood. He came dressed in a green suit white shirt and yellow tie(some people called him a leprechaun). We will have to wait a bit longer to meet Cynthia’s boo (Mike Hill) she brought a spare,who she calls a good friend. We also meet friends of Nene, Yovanna (in a bright yellow dress) and her husband.

At the beginning of the event, there is wine tasting. The camera’s plays close attention to Yovanna’s drinking as is it less of a taste and more of a swallow. As the guest’s move to the main room. We hear Yvonne say’s something like about some bitch better hurry up with her drink. By his expression, her hubby knows she is leaving this dimension.

Eva, tells Yovanna “its nice to meet you” Apparently this riles her. It seems that Eva and Yovanna went to Clark Atlanta University. and they have a friend in common, in fact the friend is gonna be in Eva’s wedding.

Suddenly there is DRAMA! Not from Dennis and Kandi, he’s heard all the stuff she has said about him. Not even from Porsha and Kandi. Its Yovanna. she’s very annoyed. She tells Eva, You said its very nice to meet you, as if this is the very first time we met? I don’t recall meeting you. Eva Responds. THAT’S IMPOSSIBLE!! I was THAT BITCH “Yavonna” from CAV! Yavonna says emphatically! Yovanna’s husband buried his face in his hands in total embarrassment.

When someone asked her why was so this important? She said I’m trying to find out why she never spoke . I guessing as Eva’s. Career blossomed Yovanna may be a lil jeli.

In her confessional, Eva said ‘There is absolutely no way I would hang out with someone who would opt to wear a flammable dress reminiscent of a banana flavored condom”

The episode began with a little tease from Bravo, we see male legs descending the stairs at Lake Bailey, who was slicing strawberry. It wasn’t her new boo (Mike Hall), it was Noelle’s father Leon.

Cynthia and Leon are the coolest parents on reality tv. Not only are they good friends but they are one when it comes to parenting their daughter, with Leon being more the disciplinarian of the two. Cynthia, wants her to have fun and get her own apartment, Leon wants her in a dorm and using public transportation.

We then get to visit Tanya Sam’s home and learn she and her fiance spend a lot of their time between Atlanta and San Francisco. Nene tells her the girls like her but wonder why after three years hasn’t she married?

Porsha meets with Kandi to talk about Dennis and tattoos in such. Porsha reminds Kandi, how Kandi doesn’t like it when people talks about her. And she isn’t concerned about the tattoos. Porsha tells her, most people’ vagina’s and penis’s aren’t exclusive. Kandi comes back with, but we don’t tattoo every bodies names on us that we gone had sex with. Kandi admits to being messy and seems genuinely concerned about Porsha, moving too quickly in the relationship with Dennis. Note: The problem is two fold. Their relationship is mending and they are not close. The other is, a true friend would talk to her first about her concerns and not tell everyone in the Atlanta Metro Area.

The episode ended in Dennis’s loft. Its his birthday. A chef his hired and is preparing a buttery feast ( and I mean buttery-did you see the hunk of butter on those biscuits) for twenty. Nothing low cal (I fucking love the south)!!! Porsha brings up the gossip about them. He tell her everyone has a pass including Kandi, and he knew about her back in the day. But hey it was back in the day.

He give her an gift of an expensive necklace and she gives him to boxes. The first one contains baby shoes and the second contained baby clothes. Confused, Porsha told him she’s expecting.

Tender moment: Dennis cried while hugging Porsha after the pregnancy reveal

Overcome, Dennis rested his head on her shoulder, showing he had been crying as he finally lifted his head, with her telling him: ‘I love you.’

Later, she said in a confessional: ‘I have never had someone love me the way he does.

Tears flowing: Porsha wiped away the tears of joy

‘I have never had someone want to be there for me. So that’s why this pregnancy is like a miracle to me. Because I am starting to see all these things that I have prayed for and wanted for so many years actually happen.’

What do you think of the housewives so far…… hit us back

CityFella

Last Week  Kandi was Messy, it was all Porsha and Dennis, or Dennis and Porsha

Click on the link below for all Kandi’s Mess

https://sacratomatovillepost.com/2018/12/03/the-real-housewives-of-atlanta-s11-ep5-messy-kandi-b-in-tatted-tales/