Your dinner is trying to escape

See the source image

It was one of my friends favorite Chinese restaurants.  You must try it!  he said,  “Hands down it beats any Chinese restaurant in San Francisco.

Due to an accident, it took an extra half an hour to get downtown.   I was starving.  After being seated, I left to go to the restroom.

Upon my return, I could see behind a picture hanging on the wall.  Behind the picture were a few critters of the insect variety.  Panicked , I didn’t embarrass the host or wreck the evening for everyone, but one thing was clear,  I wasn’t eating.


I can’t be the only one in the entire world who has seen those crawling creatures.   My mind went into overdrive as the waitress was taking orders.  Maybe its my overactive imagination.   So, I clumsily excused myself and returned to restroom.   Slowly looking behind the picture.  Yep, they ARE back there and its Quite the Village.     Ain’t no way I’m eating….

Returning to the table (yes, I looked again) some of my tablemates asked if everything was okay?  I told them, it was my nervous stomach.   Then went and ordered Fried Won Tons.    Fried foods calms your stomach? someone asks.      Yes, I said.

The food was coming out.  It was quite the production, giant platters and bowls of steaming hot food.   Hey’ there is a lot of food so feel free, its really good.

I thoroughly inspected my won ton, looking closely for body parts.  Cleared, the won ton was good.

The food, looked and smelled good.  There were many mmmmmmm’s .   I was weakening, the fat man on a won ton diet?  Bullshit.    I asked for some rice and my mainstay, orange chicken.   “That’s all you want? there is plenty”, someone said.    I was looking around to see if I could see something that didn’t belong.  What I wanted to do is  sift through the food.  Well, can’t do that.

Just as I was about to get a scoop of the beef broccoli. Someone said, I think something is alive on your plate, and its trying to escape.

While I would have been a bit more discreet.  She wasn’t , I think people could hear her in East Sacramento.   I am soo happy she did.   My Won Ton was great, Thank you!






Grey hair grows faster

Oh my fucking gawd! I’m thirty. It was devastating, my youth!

Turning forty was less shocking however, I spent the first two years of my forties saying I was thirty nine.

One day, I noticed a grey hair in my goatee, I didn’t think anything about it. A few days later there were three, all in the same neighborhood. Not today, I thought to myself as I quickly plucked those bad boys out.

Months went by, I was on a weekend vacation with the family. I looked in a mirror and there they were, all grouped up together. A renegaded bunch standing tall like they were Teamsters. Well you don’t eff with the Teamsters. So I did what a normal guy does, I carefully covered them in black Kiwi shoe polish.

By my fiftieth birthday the Teamsters had won. Their diabolical plan had worked, AND they were expanding. The mustache was beginning to have more salt than paper. To fight them off I bought “Just for men” However, with the basic black I started to look like a Deacon at the First Eucalyptus Missionary Baptist Church. I now know Medium brown works best for me. Warning : Don’t color your southern hair, you’ll learn a few new dance moves, just saying.

God has a sense of humor. The grey hair suddenly started to grow faster. I had to get a part time job so I could afford to cover the grey. In addition to facial hair, the nose hair started growing faster. You just know, when people are not looking into your eyes and staring at your braided nose hairs. I have worn out several nose rimmers. As more baby boomers come online, someone like Dewalt or Black and Decker will make a heavy duty hair trimmer.

If your forty or forty plus, embrace the grey, you’ll go before it does.


They were SERIOUS about their “Panther” seats There is a bullet hole in the theater ceiling to prove it.!

Image result for amc fire tower 12

Photo: Google

Remember way back in day, when you could go see a movie and sit anywhere?

Well that is so, 2015.  Today in some of the newer theaters, with  power loungers the seats are assigned.  So it often much longer to buy a ticket in the new style theaters.  To make matters worse because of the space they require the new theaters have fewer seats.  Image result for amc fire tower 12

A few weeks ago here in Sacratomatoville, I saw “I Tanya”  in one of the newer theaters. The theater wasn’t much larger than my living room * 44 seats.

“Black Panther”is the hottest movie ticket in America today.

On Friday February 23th,  30 year old Shameka Latrice Lynch bought a ticket at the AMC Fire Tower 12 in Greenville, North Carolina, for the 11.45 showing of the Black Panther Movie.

When Shameka arrived in the theater she discovered someone in her seat and it wasn’t Goldilocks.    Because their names was on the Police report I’m guessing it was either  Deandre Cox or Randy Jones sitting in her seat and I’m guessing  they wouldn’t move.

Ms Lynch, paid for the  tickets and wanted to sit in her seat.  Quick, fast and before previews!   To get their attention, a National Rifle Association approved 32 caliber pistol was fired into the ceiling.

Not only did she get the full attention of the two men allegedly sitting in her seats.  She had the full attention of the people in theater.

When the police arrived, Ms Lynch seat was empty. In fact all the seats were empty, not only in theater two ,but in all twelve theaters.   The police evacuated the entire complex.

Ms  Lynch turned herself in on Saturday (24th )where she is being held until $250,000 until her court date on March 14th.

Early news reports say’s she was the person who fired the gun.  Witnesses in the theater says a black man, wearing a blue and white striped shirt and hat fired the gun.

A couple of days later (26th), Greenville police arrested Chadwick Cherry.  The Tarboro, North Carolina resident, is facing two charges of assault with a deadly weapon and one count of discharging a weapon in an enclosure to incite fear. Mr Cherry is being held on a $300,00 bond.Image result for chadwick cherry north carolina



One wonders, what would have happened if someone would have asked a theater employee for assistance.  For all of their actions, they may have to wait for “Black Panther’  to appear on TV.

I still haven’t seen “Black Panther and when I do.  I’m going to an old school movie theater with ordinary seats. Excuse me please ,sorry didn’t mean to step on your toe. SORRY!


*My living room doesn’t have 44 seats.

64yo Girlfriend attacks Boyfriend for watching porn

One crisp Febuary morning . Miss Gayle Tindall of Fort Pierce Florida caught her man watching porn and                                    ENTERTAINING HIMSELFJack Faps in their home.

She wasn’t pleased, SHE WAS PISSED!   Image result for angry woman with steam coming out her ears gif She and her boyfreind argued  Image result for older couple arguing gif before she went to work.    At work Gayle said she was mad all dayImage result for mad older woman gif. When she came back for work she was STILL MAD.    When the boyfreind returns ,he tries to calm her down,then called her some mean names Image result for angry older woman gif she attacks the boyfriend. Grabbing his arm and digging her nails and scratching him.     She lives the room and when she return she throws a phone  Image result for older woman throws phone gif and calls police.   Gayle calls police.  The Police notices scars on boyfriend.

Gayle was arrested for battery and fined $250.  She has to say away from her boyfriend who is now free to watch all the porn he wants Related image at home until she goes to court March 13. Image result for yes ma'am gif



I hate Valentines Day

With a passion!

And I’m NOT alone!   To be fair, I struggle with any and all days that prompt me or obligate me to act or to do something on a particular day, Including Christmas,    I have Turkey all year round and I’ve had duck on Thanksgiving.

Somewhere today someone is being pressured to do something for their significant other.   Somewhere tonight there will be tears and resentment,separation and possibly divorce,because of this day.   The other three hundred sixty four days is meaningless.

I am a romantic man. I rarely miss a birthday and throughout the years  I have bought flowers, gifts, (Diamonds) just because.

Throughout the years I have been pressured, by friends, colleagues to participate in this manufactured holiday.    I have stood in long lines on V-day, at a drug store with other sad sacks, buying whatever that was available so there would be some semblance of peace when I got home.

   For years, a friend worked overtime, he bought nothing for himself, to buy his wife a New Mercedes SUV for her birthday.   Three weeks later, she was outraged!  She said, she was the only woman in her section who did not get anything on V-Day!  The couple fought for a week.

For those who love V-day carry on.   For me participating on this day is disingenuous and I will not participate.  There are some who might say.  This day symbolizes love and a gift is merely an extension of that  love you have for the that special person in your life.

If V-Day, is the only day my love and affection has value?  Bye Felicia!




Real Housewives of Atlanta S10 EP12 “Peaches be Trippen”

Image result for the real housewives of atlanta season 10 episode 12

The Will/Cynthia drama played a small part in last nights episode. If we were to believe the hype, the blow up would continue with some big reveal, it didn’t happen. Porsha gave us another (what I heard?) he was an opportunist and while he didn’t have strong feeling for Cynthia he was going ride this wave.

What we did learn, there is still a lot of love between Peter and Cynthia. Peter left the party early cause he wasn’t ready to see his ex wife with another man. Cynthia lights up when she sees Peter and wants to be friends.

Kenya”s role this season, is the happy bride. Last night she revealed she was six weeks late and knows of the challenges of being 46 and trying to start of family After one test the fertility clinic is in holding pattern as the urine test was inconclusive.

Poor Porsha, you know things are bad when they drag out Mama Joyce to film with you. They get together for lunch and talked about last seasons drama with Phaedra. Joyce asked all the common sense question we asked last season. With such a serious allegation of drugging and what you knew about Kandi, why wouldn’t you follow up, why would you take Phaedra’s word and run with it? Joyce reminded Porsha, Kandi could have sued her and taken everything AND if it were her,she’d be driving Porsha’s Rolls Royce. Joyce told Porsha, that while Kandi is angry,she has a soft core and will eventually come around.

With Kenya missing in action, Cynthia and Nene seem to be back on. The two met for dinner and discussed the drama with Will. Given a choice Nene prefers Peter over Will. The two discuss the next vacation or Bravo field trip, this time Barcelona Spain. The two review who to invite.

Porsha hosts a ‘No Beef Dinner” as Porsha is newly Vegan. Marlo arrives first, being critical of Porsha’s house. Kim arrives and once again we see the Fucking Red Solo Cup? There are drinking glasses, wine glasses and the ” Queen of Hooterville” arrives with a plastic Red Solo cup!

(I need a moment)


Maybe yall can tell me what’s with da cup?

The topic of course is Cynthia, who was the last to arrive. When she arrives, a lot of the women can’t look at her, which confirms her suspicions. They were just talking about her. Marlo is belching like a 300 pound man. Not sure if she was drunk but at one point she says ,she has to leave to visit a cousin in a Nursing home. Someone said Visiting hours are over. Marlo comes back and says, not this one, its 24 hours. Marlo is clearly lying between belches and Porsha’s calls her on it. You mean your going to see one of your new benefactors, your new boo at nursing home?

Its a girls trip, Kim wants bring Kroy, who seem to have had absolutely nothing going on in his life. Not only is he driving Miss Daisy (Kim)everywhere. He waits for her while she’s at a party fighting with Keny Its rare that you see Kim without Kroy. We know Kenya’s leaving her hubby bubby to fight with da girls AND based on her history WE KNOW Kim isn’t going and she bails.

The final scene, the housewives is heading to the airport. Everyone except a late Kandi

With all the hoopla with Nene and Kim returning. I’m not feeling a real contribution to the show. Nene is still funny but Kim seems desperate. The unnecessary fights with Kenya and the that stupid comment about a sexual come on from Kandi makes me want to show her the door.

Next week Barcelona.

Your thoughts?


The Nation might be better served by politicians with less grey hair

Image result for state of the union address 2018 DEMOCRATS

Americans Held Hostage Year 10

If you regularly read this blog, you know I’m not a fan of Donald Trump.  While we have never have seen a man as divisive as President Trump.  It impossible to blame the political climate on Trump. 

There where serious problems within the individual parties  before he was elected. After becoming President, the GREAT DIVIDE between the two parties has grown wider. Child like, finger pointing in the order of the day.  “But what about what they did ”  .

Let’s be clear, its Party Before Country!!!!

Prestige Position and Power! men and women shaking the hands of the right people in the parties. Voting as told, a lifetime of patience waiting to be assigned to an influential and powerful committee.  A few years ago, the Tea Party opposed the system and nearly divided the Republican party as members of the Tea Party weren’t life long politicians and demanded a place at the table. 

 As Americans are entering  the tenth year as hostages of their government.  There isn’t any indication of a meeting of the minds between the two parties.   As the infighting between the two parties continues, important legislation remains unsigned  Bipartisanship is simply a word or Idea.  Americans are still waiting.


The Current State of the Union

“Given a choice, I would prefer you to marry out of  your race and religion than to marry a Democrat”

“I Don’t Care how nice his mother is ! You are not allowed to play with ANY Republicans “



1. simple elegance or refinement of movement “she moved through the water with effortless grace”.

2. To honor or credit to (someone or something )by one’s presence.  “he bowed out from the sport he has graced for two decades” 


A few Democrats boycotted the President’s State of the Union Address.  A mistake in my view..   We may not  like or respect the views of the man in office, however as politicians they need to respect the office.   

We teach our children to be respectful, to be a good sport ,to stick it out and not retreat because we don’t like their opinion or their personality.

Someone has to rise above, the Crazy.  Someone who st remembered the basic lessons from his parents.   Perhaps we would be better served by those who still remember.  Perhaps someone with less gray hair.

It cant be any worse than it is today