Kracking Up


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Reality is slowly sinking into Prezy Poo.  He never really had a grasp on how government worked. 

Despite his best efforts he BLEW it.  He didn’t listen to those seasoned members of the GOP who advised him to talk about the economy, record unemployment. He instead went for FEAR, TERROR and MAYHEM.  As a result, many of his supporters bailed on him and went blue.

If he wants money for a Parade?  he may need approval from some of those low I Q members of Congress.

Money for a wall, that Mexico will eventually pay for? He may need approval from a one or two Mexicans.

What did you say about banning Muslims?  Again perhaps you should talk to the two Muslim members just elected to Congress?

 More than 100  women were elected in Congress last week.  Women were elected into the Senate, for the first time nearly 25% of the Senate is female.  More ladies will be heading States.  At one point in your administration you will need a WOMAN’s approval.  I’m sure you NEVER dreamed you would need permission from a woman.  Welcome to 2019 and beyond and remember, these women will outlive the men in your administration! 

Mr President, You have spent the last few years avoiding Americans. Your administration is filled with people who look like you.  Last last week America came to you. 

Congress writes the checks so , If you need any money, you will need approval from Gay’s, Native Americans, Muslims, Blacks, Asians and Mexicans, all Americans.

CityFella

 

 

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Some last minute red meat racism for the base


Midterm Madness courtesy of The Prez!

“Pre-Fab Manufactured Fear”

 

Any day now, the Prez is going to send over FIVE THOUSAND TROOPS to protect our borders from thousands of menacing Latinos who are several hundred miles away.

Did I mention most are walking? Which means they won’t be here until EASTER.

    Because not only are they coming they are coming with diseases. Some nice folks at Fox News says some members of the Caravan are bringing Small Pox others have Leprosy.   Oh Wow!

There is nothing like a little fear and racism to motivate some of the base. Particularly those who don’t realize Small Pox was eradicated in the 70’s.

For some,on the right,this is GUARANTEED grade AA red meat.  Good,possibly misguided people who will vote because while they don’t know what Leprosy is,they know they don’t want it.

Meanwhile at the border. It will be, sports, crushing boredom, videos and endless Uno games until these evil people appear at our borders. I forgot to mention there are  middle easterners that he is convinced who are hidden in the caravan, who are hell bent to blow up something.

As we wait. The Prez wants to change the fourteenth amendment. To prevent those born on our pristine soil from automatically becoming citizens. This will appeal to his limited base. Who believe Immigrants ( code word Mexicans) is the problem with this country. They don’t speak American and come here to have babies to get on welfare!

Today, he will tell his base he will get it done by Executive order. Which is completely false. Like his proposed NEW STYLE tax cut for the middle class, both will evaporate after next week’s mid terms.

Finally, in a week where Donald Trump wants to convince his base he’s not a racist.

He thought he’d call the Black Florida Gubernatorial candidate, Andrew Gillum “A Stone Cold Thief”

Can’t make this stuff up.

As for real proof?

Fake news, fake news, fake news.

SMH

CityFella

I gotta go, and I GOTTA GO RIGHT NOW!!!


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If you are a person of a certain age, you know what I’m talking about.  For others this is Russian.

Long gone are the days when you could ignore the pressure.  Play Tennis, lube a car.

Today, you have to plan ahead to avoid Armageddon!!!  “What’s that smell”

Sometimes, I think I’m still sixteen with lots of time.  With pressure on 10, I can tighten those muscles as  I walk up two flights of stairs and as soon as I reach for the keys to freedom.  The dam breaks right at the front door.

“What’s that Smell”

“God has a sense of humor”

CityFella

 

Michael Dwayne,rubbing produce on your A** wont keep them fresh


There is so much media content online  these days its possible to get confused, or not.

Saturday Afternoon, someone called the Manassas, Virginia PD to report a man inside Giant Food store.  The man was pulling down his pants and rubbing the produce on his ass AND THEN putting the produce back on the shelf .

The ass rubbing nasty man was 27 year old Michael Dwayne Johnson of Manassas.    Man-ASS-as   (coincidence-moving on)

He was arrested, charged with indecent exposure and destruction of property.

 

The workers had to destroy several pallets of produce

I’m sure they did their best. BUT what if they missed a head of lettuce.   A head destined to be the centerpiece for a salad at a large dinner party.

The host rinsed the lettuce and noticed…………………

I will end here

CityFella

 

Don’t mind me, I’m just a man in women’s clothing taking videos in the women’s restroom


Shawn Hallett (Source: GPD)

 

A lady in a restroom QT store in Greenville, South Carolina told the police she knocked on the stall door of a restroom and heard a males voice, but after peeking under stall and seeing women’s shoes all was right with the world.

Until, she saw a cell phone appear under the divider and then she called the law!

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The law found 38 year old Shawn Thomas Hallett of Levelland Texas.  Mr Hallett ,was wearing a wig, make up ( lets hope it was the correct color pallet and foundation that’s so important when your trying to blend in.  In the ladies restroom. )  and women’s clothing ( no word on the designer).   On him ,was a cell phone with a video of the woman from the adjacent stall.

He was charged with voyeurism.

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Why Greenville?  family, friends, fashion?

Its over 1300 miles away from Levelland Texas

Early reports say,  Mr Hallett in the county jail

“As the stocking turns”

CityFella

 

 

 

 

The Real White House (Part 719) DT: Omarosa is a Dog!


Viewers of this reality show knows when this star gets scared.  He lashes out on twitter.

   Did PDT, call black employees working on The Apprentice set,niggers?

 

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Is there tape? has he used nigger before?    Sarah Sanders, wouldn’t go there today!  She said she could’t guarantee PDT has ever used the word.   She didn’t say HELL NO! ” The Prez ani’t never evah! evah! evah! called nobody a nigger!”   Noooo, she wasn’t gonna tell that lie, TODAY!

 

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We feel you Kandi Burress Tucker!

On your basic reality show you get a sense of who the liers are?      “Omarosa’s credibility doesn’t exist.     But in THIS White House she’s safe, because who tells the truth in this White House?  Who  would you ask?  Sarah Sanders,  Kelly Ann Conway? how bout Sean Spicer?

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Hell’s waiting room is full, today you need a ticket, just to get in line!

Omarosa, knows PDT.    She knows where all of his buttons are.

Its as,if she has written the script and the players were perfect  on point, especially PDT.

She told NBC, she spoke to Robert Muller,

“Think about it “

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Her book was officially released today!

“And She Got him”

Today, as people are standing in line to Vote in four states.

 NO news show is talking about elections. They are talking about

“Omarosa Manigault Newman “

and how PDT has insulted yet another woman!   Attacked another Black Person!

Give Omarosa a standing ovation !

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Because today, on Election Day ,they day her book came out she caused PDT to become……

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Well Played!!!

 

CityFella

The Real Housewives of New York: S10 ep18 “The Real Poop and nothing but the Poop”


Real Housewives Of New York Recap: There’s No Place Like Home

 

The reunion plane is boarding and ready for take off . There are two more episodes before it lands. Last night  we are beginning to see some sparks and possible fights during the reunion.  Bethenny and Carole is a given but the Colombian blow up between Luann and Dorinda is simmering.   Luann is crazy if she thinks Ramona isn’t going to comeback after taking a swipe at her remodeled Hampton home and everyone except Sonja is going to take a crack at Bethenny.

 “Lets talk about some Shit”

The ladies survived the boat ride from hell.  Tinsley is still caught up in her feelings about the trip .  Tinsley is still in denial.  Insisting that it was merely bumpy and the near death experience was a bit exaggerated . Carole said that Tinsley was in denial, like a battered woman  (everything was fine)and the tears began to flow.

Lets move on to some real shit.  The ladies spent a lot of time talking about their bowl movements, who is having solid or loose.  The conversation went into some deep shit, like how frequent and the consistency of the shit.  We learned that Ramona, lost a nugget and the east side executive smeared that shit across the floor, in their rented house in Columbia, that is some serious shit!

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  Som more Shit  (TMI)

Last night we learned that Ms Sonja Tremont Morgan frequently wears a diaper.   YESSSSSSSS  Ladies and Germs.  A d-i-a-p-e-r.    Ms Morgan is an on the go gal.  She wears one when she goes to the Hamptons. Why be delayed by a number 1 or number 2,  when she is wearing something that gives her that exclusive feeling and she can avoid those icky public toilets.

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As long as she is sitting in her own squish, who are we 2 judge?

“Right on Maude” I mean “SONJA”

A lil more shit with Sonja.   Her East Side Townhouse in on the rental market.  She no longer has a wait staff, so she is responsible for her cat and dog poop.   Who seem to have free rein and in the winter poop isn’t a problem, however with the melting snow, she is overwhelmed with poop and a potential client is on route.

Our divorced Ramona, (Mario who?)  is renovating everything.  Her Apartment, her boobies and now her 7000sf home in the Hampton’s .    When it comes to her decor, no stuffy design shops or Home Depot’s for her, its about point and click.    She is excited, Dorinda,Sonja and Luann are the first to see it .   There is no real imagination (to be fair, its in its early stages) but what we saw was white on white on white, with touches of gray and dog poop proof rugs.  For now its as sterile as a hospital waiting room.

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Bravo can be shady and if I were Ramona, I’d be pissed after seeing this episode.

We get to see Bethenny’s 4000sf new apartment which is completely done. Bethenny likes white too, but the touches, the unique furnishings, elevates her place well beyond Ramona’s

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The only let down is the closet.  Real Housewife of Beverly Hills,  Lisa Vanderpump’s is larger than many New York Studio apartments and better appointed.

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We love you Ramona! (sorry).  Sonja saw her apartment in its early stages.  Dorinda saw the final product.  The two sits down for a salad . Dorinda tells Bethenny she is still reeling from the trip, physically and emotionally AND she is still PISSED at Luann after what she went threw hell with TOM!   What kills me about this, both of them are being phony, kissy, kissy, we love each other and everything is fine!  Meanwhile, both of them are telling anyone who will listen, they’re pissed!

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Bethenny and Sonja goes denim designers house. WHERE we learn they use sandpaper around the men crotch to make the package seems larger .

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Last night there was not one but two parties.  Carole hosted a casual athletic leisure themed party for  her Cosmo party. Based on her article about her she wrote about her participation in the NY marathon.  Home girl looked good as she arrived a track suit.  Dorinda splashed in with a tight zipped number in heel’s  Tinsley showed up in pigtails wearing her Columbia shirt WHERE she played tennis.   Her boo Scott was there in his trademark (yawn) sweater and jeans.     Carole’s ex Adam was there. It looks like Adam wants her back and two look good together.   Scott and Tinsley wants them to get back together

Ramona had a pre-lunch party for her skin care line.   My favorite part of the party was Sonja, who thought she would have a launch party of her own at Ramona’s party. As she came with shoes for some of the Housewives.  Some not all, Dorinda, shouldn’t expect a pair of shoes from the Sonja Collection anytime soon.

Notably missing from either party was Bethenny

 With Carole now hanging out with Tinsley and Luann and Dorinda on simmer. Bethenny and Luann are slowly getting close.  Last night Luann said:  “Now that Carole “out of the way,”  she can hang out with “fun” Beth.

Thoughts? 

Cityfella