Family Brand


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There are entire families who for whatever reason buy a specific car brand or make.   There are Ford, Chevy, Honda, and Toyota Families where most of the people in that family buy a particular make

My parents brought me home from the hospital in an Old Green Buick Roadmaster, I’m not sure if it was made in the late 1940’s or early 50’s.  I’m sure my older brother who was in high school at the time,hoped they had dropped me with another family.

The Roadmaster ran until it didn’t, it was replaced with my mothers dream car, 1955 white and blue Buick Century.  As a very young child I remembered the heater didn’t work and neither did the radio.  The engine made a very loud sound on the freeway when you accelerated.  My mother loved that car.

The Century stopped running a couple of years after my dad died.  While I had dreams of being a passenger in a Mustang, T-Bird or Pontiac GTO, she replaced the Buick with an ugly hang your head in shame 1964 Brown Chevy Bel Air.    It was the first car we owned that wasn’t of a different decade. In this car the heater worked and the am radio was intermittent, a bump in the road could bring music or take it away.

My brother was a Chrysler fan and owned a bright blue Desoto when I was a child.  After he married be bought a Cadillac.

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His first new car was 1965 Buick Skylark Grand Sport, it was Red and a black vinyl roof the car had 4 on the floor attached to a monster 455 cubic inch V8.    My mother became a legend the first time she drove the car.   It was a perfect day, everyone seemed to be outside.  My mother was used to driving the BelAir with a small block V8 .  Not the monster 455.   Pulling away from the curb she left two perfect skid marks half way down the block.   People cheered, my brother and I were proud.  We also knew she was scared shitless.  When she returned, people crossed the street surrounding my mother in the car. She acted as if she did this everyday.  No longer was she the widow, Sunday school teacher,  she was a bad ass!

I’m not a psychologist I wonder why do entire families buy a certain brand?    At the time, Buick’s weren’t  reliable cars, they shared parts with other General Motors vehicles.  But its something about the Buick, they always get my attention.  Its like the brand is in my blood, I have never owned Buick.

  The first brand my son remembers was a Mazda, years later his first car was a Mazda. A couple of years ago he bought a Toyota SUV but he looks at Mazda ‘s as I do Buick’s. I know there is a a part of him wishes he bought a Mazda.           Zoom Zoom

CityFella

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Britain:Woman sucessfully sues dating agency for failing to find her a boyfriend


A British woman sucessfulluy sued a dating agency for failing to deliver her a boyfriend.

Tereza Burki, 47 was awared a $17,000 payout after an exclusize dating agency failed to find the man of her dreams, father of her child.

The mother of three forked out $16,000 for Seventy Thirty Ltd’s services.  She told the High Court the agency had told her it only dealt in “creme de la creme” matches and could introduce her to “bachelors you dream of meeting”

But despite having more than 7000 members, only 100 of them were men actively looking for love.

Judge Richard Parkes QC ordered the agency to repay Ms Burki’s fee — saying she had been “deceived” by Seventy Thirty’s then-managing director.

He told the court: “Gertrude Stein quipped that whoever said money can’t buy happiness didn’t know where to shop.”

Tereza Burki successfully sued a dating agency after it failed to find her love.
Tereza Burki successfully sued a dating agency after it failed to find her love.Picture: Supplied, Tereza Burki/Facebook.

This case is about a woman looking for romantic happiness who says she was tricked into shopping in the wrong place, paying a large sum to a dating which, she says, made promises but failed to produce the goods.”

The court was told Tereza signed up for the dating agency in 2014 looking for a wealthy man with “a lifestyle similar or more affluent than her own”.

The mother-of-three also wanted her new boyfriend to have “multiple residences” and be willing to provide her with another child.

Tereza, who lives in plush Lennox Gardens, Chelsea, said she “felt very let down and disappointed” that the agency’s claims were “untrue”.

Giving evidence, she said: “You shouldn’t promise people who are in a fragile state of mind, in their mid-40s, the man of their dreams.

“You are entrusting a service you believe is professional, who will take care of your interests and have your best interests at heart.”

As well as giving her money back, the judge awarded her $650.for the “disappointment and sadness” she suffered — bringing her total payout to $17,644.

BUT the mother was ordered to pay Seventy Thirty $6500.  in libel damages after writing a damning Google review of the agency where she branded it a “scam”.

Seventy Thirty Ltd said: “Ms Burki entered into membership with the wrong assumption about the number of potential gentlemen we would introduce her to.

“She assumed it would be like internet dating, but we are a niche, exclusive agency, not a mainstream, mass-market online dating service. We are not going to have thousands of members because there simply aren’t thousands of single, wealthy, high-calibre prospects out there.”

The Sun/UK

#metoo Consider the man?


Believe the woman!

I am a supporter of the #meetoo movement.  For hundreds of years men, have abused women, at home, school and in the work place simply because they could.   I was one of those men who remained silent because speaking up could damage my upward mobility.   Many women suffered in silence for those same reasons.   Its not just an American issue, its a global issue.  It is one of the reasons that I believe women should have a greater presence in government, because the root of the abuse is power.

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Silence at the Boys Club

https://sacratomatovillepost.com/2017/11/29/the-operating-hours-of-the-boys-club-may-change-without-notice/

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It is also why I believe those in powerful positions almost feel its is within their right to abuse women and others.

I recently learned that someone accused me of touching them in appropriately at a holiday party last year.  The individual said I brushed her breasts and she was offended. I don’t remember the incident or the women.  But apparently she knows me and has spoken to others about the event.  Two women at a resent gathering defended me, they have known me for sometime and alerted me.  If given the chance, I would apologize to her.   I wish she would have said something  when it happened as I would have bent over backwards to apologize.

Today, I’m troubled.  I am powerless and will have to let it pass.    If she was afraid to talk to me a year ago, its not likely she will speak to me today.  I am not a high profile person, but known in some circles.  I wonder how many people has she told and how many people believe her?   It will pass.

There is a sudden turn, a brush as the two of you are reaching for the same dinner roll.  Hands…..there is intent and accidents.  

There are many men, especially men of color who are/were in prison,others killed because someone believed the woman.    If the woman says she was uncomfortable, or harassed I strongly believe the matter should be investigated. While I support the movement, I’m not ready to give anyone a blank check .  I wonder have we tilted too far in one direction.  Believe the woman……. Consider the Man?

CityFella

Clinging to the past


28 years ago “Fresh Prince of Bel Air” premiered on NBC. Starring, a 21 year old Willard Carroll Smith Jr (as Will)

Last week, I came across a video of Janet Hubert on Facebook. While most people know Will Smith, few people know Ms Hubert by her given name. However, she is known the world over as the original Aun’t Viv, she was 34 years old, when the show premiered.

M’s Hubert, was replaced by Daphne Maxwell Reid at the beginning of the fourth season.  Rumors suggested  Ms Hubert was difficult on the set of the sitcom, bumping heads with cast members and it’s star.

For the last 25 years years, Mr Hubert has been in a one person feud with Will Smith. She has blamed him for her inability to get work, her financial situation and  her son’s attempted suicide.

In her July 16th (2018) you tube post, she directs the video directly at Mr Smith. In addition to Smith, she attacked Perez Hilton, the black community and called Bet and Vibe the nigger networks.

It’s clear she has been trolling the Smith family, wife Jada and their children. She wants a face to face meeting with Smith .While she does acknowledge, Mr Smith’s kind words about her, she want’s to talk to him about events that took place more than 25 years ago.

When I look at her other you tube posts, she quickly lashes out at anyone who questions her or disagrees with her.  It appears she is angry with former cast mates reserving  most of her ire at Will Smith and Alfonso Ribeiro who has been critical of her. From what I’ve seen, when ever she is on TV, Will Smith is front and center.  She insists the cast members dislike each other.  However, the cast seem to be in contact with each other and speak well of other cast mates. With one exception in 1993, where he told a Atlanta radio station she was fired, he has had nothing but positive words about his experience with Ms Hubert.

While Smith and family have gone on to live their lives, its seems Ms Hubert life is stalled in the past and its very clear that she is comfortable looking rearward. Every now and them the Smith’s are asked to respond to something Ms Hubert has said to the press and from what I can see both Jada and Will are gracious.

There are many Ms Hubert’s who despite their words find comfort in the past. Blaming an event, an individual or individuals, a parent or someone or something  that prevents them from moving forward. With a well rehearsed story, so fresh it seemed it happened yesterday.

Many of these people need this narrative that was so damaging that they are unable to move forward.

For many of us, it is an excuse. Everyday people with challenging lives are fired, everyday someones heart is broken, we lose someone, and we are disappointed.

Hearts take time and isn’t a preset healing time. While some heart’s heal sooner that others, there are a few people who are so broken, they reject the healing process, they pick and reopen the wound to perhaps, keep the story fresh.

For some, the benefit of reliving the event is the sympathy it generates. Rarely does the narrator include a timestamp, when the event took place. In doing so, it reduces the impact of the story.

One wonders if these people are able to move on. Janet Hubert has spent 28 years angry. A lifetime.

CityFella

Trust, Love and Money: when the family wont


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Someone had to help him everyone has abandoned him, his parents,his friends, he had no one!

Is what she told the judge, on one of those judge shows. No one would help him ! I loaned him more than four thousand dollars. I got him a cell phone, paid for his broken tooth, bought him clothes so he could look for work. I fixed his car and more……..

Judge: After you bought him some of those things, when did he start paying you back? He made excuses? she said. So you kept doling out the money? Well he said, he would pay me back when he got a job. Did he get a job? Yes, and he gave me fifty dollars. Fifty dollars? How much did he owe you when he gave you fifty dollars? Almost three thousand dollars? When did a light come one? When did you realize, he wasn’t going to pay you back? Judge! Your honor! Your honor, he had no one? I believed him, he said he was going to pay me back! What happened between three and four thousand dollars? Why are you here today? Because, he lied to me, he was buying new clothes, he has a new car. I owe more than four thousand dollars .I gave him money to help him and now I have to pay it all back, its not right. I trusted him,its not right! IT’S NOT RIGHT!!! He said he would pay me back!!!!!

THE DEFENDANT: Every thing she gave me was a gift. She wanted to help me out and I appreciated it. She’s a good friend.

The Judge: I’m not sure whats going on here. Maybe you wanted to be his girlfriend. Several times you said, no one would help him. I need you to think about this. When a man of 30 says, no one would will help him, alarm bells should go off. There is a reason. He hasn’t paid you back and I am sure he hasn’t paid anyone else either.

My courtroom is filled with litigants who have co-signed, opened cell phone accounts with people with bad credit and the reason they have bad credit is because they don’t pay their bills! Then they are surprised with these people with bad credit don’t pay them back! What I can award you is the $800 cell phone bill. (the women leaves in tears)

As a parent, there isn’t much I wouldn’t do for my children. As their parent, you are more lenient with your children than the world, because they are your children.

Refusing to financially help your child isn’t easy. The difficult decision is reached after many sleepless nights. As parents we we want to protect our children from harm . However we can cripple our children with love by delaying their inevitable growth.

If you able to financially help your children do so with the stipulation they are to pay you back, the same is they would any bank or lending institution. With the exception of an illness, they are to pay you back at the mutually agreed upon time.

This is important, as you want to prepare your child at 18, or 48 for the real world. If the fail to repay you. No other loans! Again, with the exception of an illness or a catastrophic event. Note: If your child’s failure to repay you will result in anger and resentment, do not lend them money. Its not worth ruining your relationships with your children, friends and family.

Often, the best solution is allowing your child to solve the problem, it generates a sense of pride and independence.

CityFella

When she falls for her


Don’t gossip. Don’t share. Talk.

By: Corinna Amendola\ The American In Italia

Coming up with clear answers when people ask questions about heterosexual breakups is hard enough. Add gender issues and it just gets a lot harder. Intimate relationships and they way they play out remains the most irrational aspect of a person’s life — though you wouldn’t know it based on the volume of social media chatter regarding sexual choices. But here’s the thing: Very few people ever tell the whole truth online, whether about their private lives or where they stand on the LGBT debate. Exaggeration is the norm. Like racism, sexual prejudice can do a good job pretending it doesn’t exist. All of which leads me to this exchange.

Q: I’m 27 and I’ve been living with my girlfriend for a year. We met at work, dated, and slowly took our relationship to the next level. Honestly, I like virtually everything about her. The only elephant in the room was our sex life, especially after she moved in with me. Things seem to lose their intensity and she seemed to lose her drive. I asked her about it but she’d always deflect the subject to work and tiredness and the difference between dating and being in the same apartment.

I bought this for several months until she really started being distant in bed, to the point that I started thinking the obvious: another guy. So again, I asked her. She didn’t say a word that night but the next night she brought it up on her own. She said yes, there was someone else: a female coworker. Our bedroom got very quiet at that moment, because that one came at me from out of the blue.

She cried and explained she didn’t know what to say. I didn’t either, and don’t. I said I’d leave but she doesn’t want me to. Suggestions?

A: Still waters run deep. Sexual waters are murky and run ever deeper. My first response is to say, Give her some time. If she wanted you to leave to begin something different with her new lover, that would have come in the form of a clearer signal, or at least a more decisive one. Right now, she may really and truly be confused. When your sexual interests take a different turn, the whole can sometimes leave you excited, yes, but reeling. Deepening on your upbringing, it can contradict all you’ve been taught – and never mind social open-mindedness.

The two of you might want to take a break from each other so she can better understand what she wants, and you can process what’s happened. It’s easy to say: no biggie, my girlfriend just came out. But it is a biggie, for the both of you. And there’s also no way of knowing if it’s a coming out or an infatuation (which comes without gender tags). You don’t sound mad, which is a good thing since anger doesn’t really help anyone when things are out there and the people involved can talk, and it seems the two of you still can.

Keep talking, and listen. Don’t run away and hide, not if you have genuine feelings. Hard as it may be, try playing friend and confidant until you know for sure where this is headed. Don’t gossip. Don’t share. Please don’t try finding out who her lover is, a natural response but one best checked at the door. Keep this between the two of you until you’re both clearer, she in terms of her new relationship, you in terms of the relationship you want to have with her going forward.

Got a mint? Michelle O and George W “Reminds us how great we are”


 

Image result for michelle obama and George W John McCain

The image of George W handing Michelle B a piece of candy at John McCain’s funeral broke the net today.

The Obama’s and Bush’s have grown close over the years

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Especially Michelle and George W.

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John McCain reportedly planned his funeral.  President Obama said, he was surprised by his invitation to speak.   Who knew the passing of hard candy would warm America’s heart.

At the funeral , his daughter Meghan, said “America was always Great” .   Images like these remind us.

After your death, we are still learning for you.   Thank you. Senator McCain!

CityFella