The Bump


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“Ask The Rodfather”

The best friendships/relationships hit a bump now and then. In short time that bump get larger and instead of looking for a solution or a cure we pick at the bump, it which builds anger and resentment.
Silence is the enemy
Left on its own, the bump becomes infected. No one wants to be the first to reach out. No one wants to talk about the bump which is front and center in their lives. Over time silence overwhelms the relationship and the infected bump has left a scar.
We can prevent this from happening
Putting ego aside, break the silence. Leave a message that says I miss your voice. You can always talk about the bump later. The most important thing is to re-establish contact. As long term silence can destroy the strongest long term relationships. Can we meet or go for……….
Bumps happens over time. They often occur when one or both parties are uncomfortable telling their truth. They sometimes fear they will be misunderstood or rejected. So they hold on to it until a bump appears.
Remember the things you love and cherish about the your friend or partner. Make an effort to spend time together. Just the two of You. Over time some people forget about the bump. However, if the bump is still present. Write about the bump. Give a copy to your friend and realize everything won’t be resolved today. It will take time. Today you have your friend or partner.
Ask The Rodfather is an Common Sense Advisor  he can be found on facebook
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Love in Pennsylvania?


Image result for donald trump rally murphysboro, ill

Photo: Google

President Trump loves the road.  If he could just run his administration out of a Luxury Coach, life would be swell.  He could cuss his staff out over the phone, no sour faces.  He could tour states like Montana and Kentucky where they love him   No rules, no you need to say…….  No you have too’s……. No boring teleprompters.  Just entertaining his base.  Being, High school inappropriate, irrelevant.  Working the crowd, ” Lock her up”

At a rally on Saturday, in an airport hanger in Murphysboro, Illionis a small town  (population 8000) over 300 miles from Chicago.  He was a bit subdued.   A few hours to the east, a City and a nation was grieving

The president had told reporters to expect a more muted rally performance.

For the first time, Trump didn’t break out his usual,  “Lock her Up” (a crowd favorite )  His performance WAS muted.   He went after Elizabeth Warren, but it was a mild attack, in which he conceded he couldn’t use his trademark moniker for her since she took an ancestry test. “No, I can’t use ‘Pocahontas’ anymore,”

This was difficult for him.  He knows his audience, this is were he gets the love.  They love the attacks, the insults.  But this night, the handlers said, we need you to be respectful, so bring it down and we mean it!!!

 Remember this date, October 27, 2018

After 10 minutes he told the excited crowd.  “If you don’t mind, I’m going to tone it down just a little bit,” “Is that OK?”   The crowd responded NO!!!

 “I had a feeling you might say that.”, said the President with a small smile.

“Paris is Burning”

The guys who aren’t any fun has told The President he has to go to Paris, or Pittsburgh.  The midterms are a week away, his poll numbers are crashing and could pull the party down.    Unlike, Montana, Kentucky, and Murphysboro there will be fewer people in red hats.   For nearly two years, Trump has avoided blue areas like Pittsburgh, in fact he has avoided most of America.

More than 44,000 people have signed an open letter from progressive Jewish leaders saying President Trump is not welcome in Pittsburgh until he denounces white nationalism.

He isn’t going to denounce white nationalism, after declaring himself a nationalist.  Throughout the day, moments before he addresses the Tragedy in Pittsburgh, his team is looking for a response that they hope will get them through next Tuesday.

There is a mobilization via Social Media.  Pittsburgh is few hours drive from New York, Philadelphia, Chicago and Washington DC.  Is there Love in Pennsylvania for the President?

CityFella

Anita, Miguel, Connie and 29 million Hispanics are eligible to vote in November


Image result for hispanics I voted stickers

Photo:Google

Anita, Miguel, and Connie are dear friends and family members.  TWENTY NINE MILLION HISPANICS are eligible to vote in the midterm elections next month.  If just 40 percent of Hispanics vote in the elections next month it could change the political  landscape of the United States.  And should Hispanics continue to vote in large numbers it will change how politicians view Hispanics.

Just 40 Percent

In an ideal world, everyone eligible to vote should vote.  If forty percent of  Hispanic voters voted in border states of Arizona and Texas it would change the direction of those states and the country.   40% of  Hispanics would determine who would be Governor, who would represent them in Congress and the Senate.

While Hispanics is far in away the fastest growing demographic, voter turnout is low.   Four years ago, only 27% of eligible Hispanic voters participated.  Verses 46% of white and 41% of black voters.

Why is Voting Important? 

Miguel , it’s is the only time when YOU have a say in what happens in your country, in your state, in your city, and who the best people to choose to operate the schools in your school district.   Its not just choosing a president, governor or mayor.   Next month voters will vote on issues that directly effects them in their state, city, town and county.  A single vote could change the direction of your community.

  Choose the party and individuals who best represent your values and issues that are important to you.

Despite the size of the Hispanics community. (The largest non white population in the country)  the community is under represented.  As a result, issues important to Hispanics are not seen as a priority and this isn’t like to change until a larger percentage of Hispanics vote and elect more Hispanics to office.

Anita, there was a time in United States when only white men could vote.  Not women or any person who wasn’t white.   Early on, black voters understood the power of the ballot box. Blacks voting  in large numbers, were elected to boards, councils, became Mayors, elected to Congress, became Governors, elected to the Senate and in 2008, Barack Obama was the first non white individual to become President of the United States.

For years, blacks fought for the right to vote.  People were killed attempting to vote and as the courts slowly agreed that blacks and all Americans could vote.  Communities began making it difficult to blacks to vote.  In 2018, history is repeating itself.  Some communities and states are attempting to suppress the black vote.

“Remember”

 

There are 435 members in the US House of Representatives (Congress)

And

100 US Senators

Hispanics are 18% of the US Population and occupy 46 seats in Congress*

 Senator Marco Rubio, Florida 

Senator Catherine Cortez Masto, Nevada

Senator Bob Menendez, New Jersey

Blacks are 13% of the Us Population and occupy 51 seats in Congress*

 Senator Kamala, Harris California 

Senator Cory Booker, New Jersey

Senator Tim Scott, South Carolina

Asians are 6% of the US population and occupy 15 seats in Congress*

Senator Mazie Hirono ,Hawaii

Senator Tammy Duckworth ,Illinois 

Connie, you and I registered here in Sacramento County in 2016.  If you choose, you can vote today using your absentee ballot.  I would like to suggest a calling your friends and family  via email and social media and make a pac to vote where every one is accountable to each other as it was 2016. We celebrated with a crazy pizza party. 

 Two years ago, we took videos with our (I voted sticker) on and posted those videos on Facebook     I regret not taking your boys.  It’s important that they be apart of the process.  

Remember,even if your guy or issue loses. If forty percent of Hispanics continue to participate in the  elections, there will be less chatter about immigration and deportations.   Other issues that are near and dear to the community will be seen in a new light.   

“I promise”   

(Feel Free to Share this with your friends)

Vote!  Vote!  Vote!

 

Cityfella

(You Know)

   * 2016 Population

“A tweet is just a tweet” Someone you know is risking their career and reputation. Could it be you?


Image result for roseanne barr

This morning Roseanne tweeted

“Don’t feel sorry for me, guys!!”  “I just want to apologize to the hundreds of people,and wonderful writers (all liberal) and talented actors who lost their jobs on my show due to my stupid tweet.”.

“Guys I did something unforgivable so do not defend me,” she wrote. “It was 2 in the morning and I was ambien tweeting-it was memorial day too-i went 2 far & do not want it defended-it was egregious Indefensible. I made a mistake I wish I hadn’t but…don’t defend it please. ty.”

.

“Overshare”

What ever happened to calling a friend?  Perhaps it’s a need for attention or public validation, but someone you know is or has posted something very personal on social media, placing her careers and reputation at risk.

I know of one person who has lost three jobs for venting about those jobs on social media.  A woman who lost her job  after up loading pictures of her simulating a sex act on social media.    ___________________________________________________________

 

What Your Facebook Use Reveals About Your Personality And Your Self-Esteem

https://www.forbes.com/sites/amymorin/2014/10/31/what-your-facebook-use-reveals-about-your-personality-and-your-self-esteem/#72f5825a321f

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Individuals posting detailed information about their troubled marriage, relationships with friends, family members, and colleagues for the world to comment .

One person, after being fired deleted his Facebook account and opened another with a different name, inviting his friends to join him on the new account.  After getting the new job old habits re-emerged. Complaints about clients and co-workers, in less than two weeks he was fired from the new job.

Postings of how many joints they had during the day, the uploading of videos of themselves being intoxicated.

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9 Things You Should Never Share on Social Media

https://www.makeuseof.com/tag/9-things-never-share-social-media/

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Why do some of us Overshare? 

Professor Russell W Belk of York University in Toronto says: The feedback of friends, family members, acquaintances, and strangers therefore provides continual criticism and validation.

“When we’re looking at the screen we’re not face-to-face with someone who can immediately respond to us, so it’s easier to let it all out—it’s almost like we’re invisible,” said Belk, of the so-called “disinhibition effect” that online sharing helps create. “The irony is that rather than just one person, there’s potentially thousands or hundreds of thousands of people receiving what we put out there.”

Still, something seems amiss when people feel it’s more important to express a desire on Facebook for the president to be assassinated than it is to, say, exercise tact or avoid losing your job. (Yes, she was fired.)

 

Another crucial ingredient encouraging online exhibitionism is, as stated by Belk, the “tension between privacy and potential celebrity.” For some people, the longing to be popular far outweighs the longing to be respected, and their social media accounts can verify this.

It’s A Free Country,What’s the big deal? 

Unlike a private conversation between friends. A posting on social media is memorialized.  What you’ve said to a certain extent is now a part of history.  Ideally the user should use the same level of caution then he or she would in an open conversation.

One can have an political opinion, an impression, when the opinion, impression crosses the line of civility the authors reputation and potential carreer could be damaged.   Students randomly tweeting and making racists or insentive videos have been tossed out of colleges all of the county, well after they attempted to delete the statement or  video.   Now apart of record, many of these students had difficultly finding a new college and that video may forever inpact their careers.

More and more employers are accessing your private social media to get a sense of who your are*    From her previous Tweets on social media ABC knew Roseanne was a risk. In the past she has been critical of the Obama Administration and has posted some controversial  theories and opinions online.   Before Roseanne2, she admitted that she had made people angry and said she would stay offline. She slipped, leaving ABC with little choice, to the cancel the show.

*Accessing one’s social media account isn’t difficult as few people vet new friends.

The Internet is public. Remember that. So even when you think you are posting something privately, once it is out into the Internet ether, it is out of your control and potentially can be used against you in the future. This is especially important in a job search. Even though a future employer (assuming they are not the government) may not be able to access your private posts, it is common to begin including coworkers as future friends. They will have access to your stuff. Keep it clean.

With that in mind, here is a list of things you should never post on social media:

Click the Link Below for the Full Story

https://collegegrad.com/blog/10-things-you-should-never-post-on-social-media

Mean spirited gossip, insults, pictures of careless drug and excess consumption of alcohol are red flags for employers.

Roseanne,Donald and You

For some of us, social media is an important part of our daily lives.  Throughout the day we are checking for texts, pictures, comments and likes.  For some nearly, all their social interaction is via an electronic device.  With one push of a button, you can interact with hundreds, millions, and receive acknowledgement from hundreds and millions more.  For some its intoxicating, and for others its an addiction.  These people   on social media, every day several times a day.  Some purposely post controversial topics to stimulate traffic on his page.       Is this you?    Can you refrain from texting or Social Media for 24 hours?

CityFella

 

Update:  Looks like Roseanne’s Twitter silence lasted a couple of hours. As she feels her co-stars threw her under the Bus.   Her tone seems a little less apologestic than this morning.