15 Things You Do Because You’re Still In Love With Your Ex


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Photo: Google

1. You still think about what-ifs

You think about the what-ifs and what-nots. You evaluate your worth what you could have done right or wrong that did not the materialize the break-up.

2. You stalk his social media accounts often

The easiest way to know whether he is missing you or not, or for that matter if somebody else is missing him or not, is to stalk his social media accounts.

3. You regret losing your true love

You regret losing him. You go back to time all the time and regret the times you rebuked him or agreed to have broken up with him.

4. You compare him with other people

Inadvertently you end up comparing him with every other guy. Nobody can match up with his obsession for X-box. For you, he makes the best cheese sandwich in the whole world. You feel nobody is good enough besides him.

5. Too many hookups

To channelize your inner anger and frustrations, you take shelter in the form of meaningless sex. Later, again you berate yourself for letting someone else for touching you in places where you actually yearn to be touched by your ex.

6. Overthinking about the time spent

Yes, you think and over think the good, bad and ugly times in your head again and again. You nitpick everything he did. Not only that you try to justify his every action in your head.

7. You find reasons to contact him

It does not matter how silly or big the occasion is. It may be your best friend’s birthday or the bad omelet you had in your breakfast, you try to contact him for the silliest reason.

8. You go back to the happy times

For you, he is the most important milestone in your life. What better to celebrate your life than reminiscing about the happy times you have had — the cuddles, quickies, the stares, you go back to every happy time.

9. You have a hard time coming to terms with rejection

You cannot still come to terms why he broke up with you. You question yourself all the time. Your ex is such a sensitive topic for you that your parents and friends hesitate to bring his name or an instance pertaining to him in front of him.

10. No future plans

You do not know what lies ahead of your future. You just cannot see yourself kissing another man or walking the aisle for another person.

11. You still talk about him

He invariably is a part of your conversation. He is not anymore present in your life. But you keep bringing him back his context in your conversations with your friends.

12. You stay in contact with his friends and family

You cannot get over the fact that he has moved on from you. So, you try and invent ways to keep tabs on him. It kills you to not know what he is doing at present. You are still in contact with his best friend or sister to get scoops from his life. You want to know, “Does he miss me?” You want to the new girl who he is dating. You try to gauge how serious they are.

13. You still have hope

The most obvious sign that you still are not over your ex, is that you still have hopes of patching things up with your ex.

14. Having doubts about you

You still have not recuperated from your bitter break up. It has taken a toll on your confidence that you fear if you can do something perfectly.

15. You do not date at all

He is so deeply invaded your blood that you do find anybody dateable at all. No matter if the guy looks like Ryan Reynolds, has money worth Mark Zuckerberg, or has the heart of James Harrison nobody is good enough for you to date.

Breakups are messy and moving on is difficult. But life goes on. Try to move on from the one that got away. Because the best is awaiting you.

The Minds Journal is a platform that brings together writers and readers from across the world to share thoughts that promote self-development.

WATCH: How Do I Stop Fantasizing About My Ex?

The Minds Journal is a platform that brings together writers and readers from across the world to share thoughts that promote self-development.

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When she falls for her


Don’t gossip. Don’t share. Talk.

By: Corinna Amendola\ The American In Italia

Coming up with clear answers when people ask questions about heterosexual breakups is hard enough. Add gender issues and it just gets a lot harder. Intimate relationships and they way they play out remains the most irrational aspect of a person’s life — though you wouldn’t know it based on the volume of social media chatter regarding sexual choices. But here’s the thing: Very few people ever tell the whole truth online, whether about their private lives or where they stand on the LGBT debate. Exaggeration is the norm. Like racism, sexual prejudice can do a good job pretending it doesn’t exist. All of which leads me to this exchange.

Q: I’m 27 and I’ve been living with my girlfriend for a year. We met at work, dated, and slowly took our relationship to the next level. Honestly, I like virtually everything about her. The only elephant in the room was our sex life, especially after she moved in with me. Things seem to lose their intensity and she seemed to lose her drive. I asked her about it but she’d always deflect the subject to work and tiredness and the difference between dating and being in the same apartment.

I bought this for several months until she really started being distant in bed, to the point that I started thinking the obvious: another guy. So again, I asked her. She didn’t say a word that night but the next night she brought it up on her own. She said yes, there was someone else: a female coworker. Our bedroom got very quiet at that moment, because that one came at me from out of the blue.

She cried and explained she didn’t know what to say. I didn’t either, and don’t. I said I’d leave but she doesn’t want me to. Suggestions?

A: Still waters run deep. Sexual waters are murky and run ever deeper. My first response is to say, Give her some time. If she wanted you to leave to begin something different with her new lover, that would have come in the form of a clearer signal, or at least a more decisive one. Right now, she may really and truly be confused. When your sexual interests take a different turn, the whole can sometimes leave you excited, yes, but reeling. Deepening on your upbringing, it can contradict all you’ve been taught – and never mind social open-mindedness.

The two of you might want to take a break from each other so she can better understand what she wants, and you can process what’s happened. It’s easy to say: no biggie, my girlfriend just came out. But it is a biggie, for the both of you. And there’s also no way of knowing if it’s a coming out or an infatuation (which comes without gender tags). You don’t sound mad, which is a good thing since anger doesn’t really help anyone when things are out there and the people involved can talk, and it seems the two of you still can.

Keep talking, and listen. Don’t run away and hide, not if you have genuine feelings. Hard as it may be, try playing friend and confidant until you know for sure where this is headed. Don’t gossip. Don’t share. Please don’t try finding out who her lover is, a natural response but one best checked at the door. Keep this between the two of you until you’re both clearer, she in terms of her new relationship, you in terms of the relationship you want to have with her going forward.

one two three four five six seven eight nine ten: Eddie Murphy’s tenth child is en-route


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Picture: Google

Fifty Seven year old Eddie Murphy, and Australian Model Paige Butcher is expecting his tenth child.   Her first child with Murphy and his ninth child (Izzy) is 2..  His oldest is 29.  They’ve been Bood up for six years .

Thanks for counting

 

CityFella

When They’re No Longer Funny:The Family Racist


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They are often naturally charming. Well liked by nearly everyone in the family. As a child they made you laugh. As you grew older, you laughed however the jokes made you uncomfortable.

You weren’t the only one. Family members saying while laughing ” Ohh you shouldn’t say that” or “That’s wrong” in mid laughter.

Despite the outrageous behavior. they are often protected by family members. “Oh he doesn’t mean it.” “He would take the shirt off his back” “She would give you her last quarter”

Over time this charming individual has made you uncomfortable when non family members are present.  Your on the edge, as you wait in terror, for the off color or racist remark to be delivered in front of the unsuspecting visitor.

Then there it is!

In living color.

As the family laughs, you look away ashamed

Your options are few. Confrontation or exit.  Ideally, you should wait for to talk, away from family.  Calmly tell him or her what you find offensive and why.  Once you’ve done this leave it.  Don’t go back and revisit the conversation, it only brings animosity.

These individuals exists in every family. They’ve may have gone unnoticed for years. Until you view the family member through the eyes of a non family member.

I’ve found some success in silent eye contact.  After all they are entertainers. They’re goal is to make everyone laugh and a good entertainer make adjustments for the audiences

They are others, who simply don’t care how their  words affect others. “This is who I am, take me or leave me! ”    When this occurs, I quietly leave.  No drama, no words are needed.   We love our families, we must except them for who they are warts and all., attempting to change who they are is like bumping are heads on a brick wall.   However, we can make adjustments and at the end of the day, its not about their feelings and how others my react to our leaving.

This is when it’s on us to make the adjustment as we teach people how to treat us.

CityFella

The World of Me!


You gotta love people who believe THEY are the most important people in the world.

They purposely cut you off on the roadways.   They appear in the express lane in the supermarket with 200 items.  They demand immediate attention, the line is for pedestrians.

When I travel, I’m usually the last one on the plane and the last one off.    Being last, usually mean I simply walk to my seat, most people are settled in, no waiting for people to stow there belonging.   I normally sit in the aisle seat near the end of plane.

One evening in Portland, I wasn’t the last passenger.  There was a lady, demanding the plane wait for her friend’s WHO were waiting for pizza.    The young woman at the counter said the flight to Sacramento was full and they were going to close the door.  NO! she shouted,  your not full, were not on, so you’ll have to wait!  They should be coming now!

Well, Hell, this is much better than the Housewives or any of the Reality shows. I wanted to see how this was going to end.    However, to see the end, would mean I would miss my flight.  So, I faked a slow limp.  DAMM!     On board, I strained my neck to see if the lady and her friends made it on the plane.        Ding, (the seat belt sign came on) as the plane was being pushed backward.   Guess they will enjoy their pizza at PDX!

What is it about those individuals, who has Chutzpah, to cut in line, push others and simply disregard all others and feel there actions are justified.

Turning the other cheek

Were human, sometime you can swallow and say to yourself, let it go, it isn’t worth it.  Then  there is that one time that your not feeling particularly Christian.  No fucking way!  Not Today!

Philadelphia:   I’m on my second leg of three legs to Sacramento.  A man enters the cabin, he’s not flight staff, he’s another passenger.  He opens the  overhead above my seat and begins to relocated the belongings of other passengers items to other bins.  I can’t believe no one isn’t saying anything.  In my head, I’m daring him to move my bag with my PC.   Sure enough, he takes my bag and I tell him to leave it where it is.   He said, he is gonna move it down.  You could feel the heat in my little section.   I told him, your going to fucking leave it where it is!  (This is unusual for me,  I’m not one for making scenes or swearing in public)  He angrily stared at me, as if!    In my head, I said to myself. you gonna end up seeing Jesus on this plane, ain’t nobody playin wit ju!      Somewhere during the flight, when the man went to the restroom, a man in the row behind me  tapped me and said, could you believe that guy, he moved MY stuff!    I’m thinking to myself, why didn’t YOU say anything.

 

Who are these people?  Did they Have indulgent parents?

One wonders, how were these people formed?  Did this form of narcissism begin as a child.  That one child who is throwing a tantrum because they don’t want to wait their turn and that indulgent parent who makes excuses and exceptions for their child’s poor behavior.    Is this the beginning, of  a skewed perception of the world that insists that their needs or demands comes before others, at any cost!

 

“We teach people how to treat us” 

One of my favorite movies is “Avalon”, directed by Barry Levinson.  It follows a Russian Jewish family as they slowly build a new life in  America.  Through the years the family immersed themselves in American culture.  Including Thanksgiving, one branch of the family is notoriously late. (not minutes,hour or so) not once ,but every time.  This was before (microwaves) and the very large family waits for the uncle and his familyto arrive before cutting the Turkey.  The children are hungry.   But they wait.  The apologies aren’t genuine.   After many years.  They start without them.   This action divides the once close family.  its very sad.    But….

We teach people how to treat us.   It is my theme.     I cant stand by and dine or travel with anyone who doesn’t  have any consideration for others.   I refuse to watch someone I know, berate another person , because he or she doesn’t want to don’t want to wait.  Those individuals don’t care if their friends are humiliated.  They simply want what they want!    When that happens, I quietly leave. No Drama, no scene’s or explanations.  I leave. All human beings deserve respect and if I should stay, I’m condoning bad behavior, it isn’t worth it…

 

CityFella

I Can Sum Up Marriage In These 11 Texts I’ve Sent My Husband


By Susannah B. Lewis (Blogger):Your Tango.com
Our text messages say a lot about our marriage.

 

While scrolling through my phone and reading the text exchange between my husband and me, I see a love story.

No, I don’t see a bunch of Xs, Os and lovey-dovey emoticons.  But I do see mistakes, arguments, parenting advice and venting sessions . I see two people navigating this life together. I see a parenting partner .I see a best friend. I see a union that thrives on a healthy dose of sarcasm.

When I read our text messages, I see a real marriage   AND I laugh ….

 This may be the most truthful text message I’ve ever sent my husband, but honesty is key in a successful relationship.

11 LOL Texts That Completely Explain Marriage

 Not only does my husband go grocery shopping, but he always takes the time to carefully and considerately explain life’s greatest mysteries to me.

11 LOL Texts That Completely Explain Marriage

 Communication is the lifeline of any marriage. I want to personally thank the inventor of text messaging for keeping ours together.

11 LOL Texts That Completely Explain Marriage

Communication via text is wonderful, but sometimes we still need to pick up the phone for a personal exchange or just to hear our spouse’s voice. Oh, and to make sure they know when to do what they need to do.

11 LOL Texts That Completely Explain Marriage

It’s a common misconception that the little weak lady needs to first consult with the big strong man when handling business. My husband often reminds me that I can do things on my own. Thanks for nudging me towards independence, honey.

11 LOL Texts That Completely Explain Marriage

 Sure, he thinks I’m a beautiful and amazing woman, but I know the difference between a sincere compliment and an “I need sex” compliment. Even through text.

11 LOL Texts That Completely Explain Marriage

 It’s the story of our lives, isn’t it, ladies? They don’t hear a word we say if it doesn’t involve the words, “Get naked now.”

11 LOL Texts That Completely Explain Marriage

 Sometimes I think he messes things up on purpose so I won’t ask him to do them again. It’s actually pretty genius. That’s why I kept running the golf cart into bushes the last time he invited me to play 18.

11 LOL Texts That Completely Explain Marriage

 The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. And the way to mine is if I don’t have to cook.

11 LOL Texts That Completely Explain Marriage

 Firmly letting your better half know that he needs to back off is acceptable.

11 LOL Texts That Completely Explain Marriage

 This. You know you’ve got a good one when he tries to console you and then volunteers to be your PMS punching bag.

11 LOL Texts That Completely Explain Marriage

Is Punk the New F Word?


 

Punk

The word has been used to bully gay black boys for decades.

By: Charles Stephens/ The Advocate.com

I have always associated creativity with a sense of pleasure, and simultaneously, a sense of danger. Self-expression in my mind conjures feelings of the forbidden. Perhaps much of this comes from my Southern black boyhood, as I started to get the sense there was safety in assimilation and considerable risk in being too free.

“Don’t be a punk,” I was told. I imagine many others like me heard this as well. The phrase served as both correction and warning.

Around 7 or 8 years old, I first started hearing other things like “Don’t laugh too hard” or “Don’t smile too much.” I was commanded, “Don’t sit that way” and “Don’t speak with a lisp.” And the most epic one of all: “Don’t cry.”

Being forced to withhold emotion early on stunts us for our entire lives. These are the ghosts that haunt us into adulthood. It’s no wonder so many of us — especially black boys — become people who struggle to articulate our feelings. The words are beaten out of us when we are kids

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Please Click on the Link Below for the full story

https://www.advocate.com/commentary/2018/5/24/punk-new-f-word